Sressed and Anxious...

Hi Everyone,

Firstly, I hope you all are doing better or at least coping with your issues.

Just want to say I just typed this message out , inadvertantly hit something

and erased the message - a big deal when you type as slow as me.

Recently I stopped receiving my benefits after a prolonged time because I

collected on two claims. So for the first time in many years I have no money

coming in. Its funny in the back of my head I knew it was dangerous for me

mentally to use this to give me a false sense of security - but I did it anyways.

So at this moment I feel anxious,guilty and worried that I will never get another

job again. I was suppossed to use this time to find something that I want to do,

but I knew I had more weeks so really didnt ponder it seriously till it was gone.

I was making a good living , basically working on my own time and my partner

did not have to work for over a decade. This is a gray area to the extent that

in retrospect these jobs had run their course and it was probably time for me

to move on.

Here is a major point: this whole mess is a mixture of apathy, laziness and Anxiety

which makes me afraid to move on or try new things because I make them a big

deal. Although that was not the case in these long time jobs where I was seen as

competent.Changes made and a dispute with another employer. who is not of right

mind, are why I dont have the jobs anymore.

But in the past my anxiety,anxiousness, have given people the wrong impression

and had a negative effect on my job success, so Im worried if I do get something

I will have to deal with this.

My partner is working now , so our bills are being paid. I know others have it worse

so I realize things could be worse. As far as the sexes go there is a double standard:

a woman can stay home and most wont think twice, a man thats a different story.

This effects me negatively in many ways. No, I dont see a therapist, the last one was

worthless and a jerk.

My partner is supportive, but I worry about for how long and the future. Its ironic, my

ego at first was lets really try and maximize your potential and now Im thinking

" whats going to happen"

Can anyone relate or have any advice?

 

been there! i've been in and out of jobs for about a year now (moving, school etc) and every time i find myself unemployed it's that sinking feeling again.. my boyfriend was paying all the bills and working his ass off to do so, and i was sitting at home desperately looking for a job. finding a job isn't easy, but something i've come to realize is that one always comes along. patience is key. tell yourself that it may take time, but you will be working again soon. and after a couple months of looking and (quite frankly, hating myself), i'm now working a job i really enjoy. and you will be too! the more you believe it will happen, the sooner it will happen :)

as for the anxiety on the job, i deal with that pretty much every day.. i've had everything from dizziness, to numb hands, to headaches, to nearly a full-fledged panic attack at work. i explained to my boss what i was going through and that i suffer from anxiety/migraines from the start and she took it very well. talking to your employer about it can definitely help, because then you don't have that feeling in the back of your mind that you have to hide it from everyone and try to remain "normal". if i feel myself getting anxious at work, i stop what i'm doing for a moment, and just focus on my breathing, tell myself i'm okay, and it usually passes. the mind is a powerful thing. anyways, i hope this helps a little! good luck!!

Thanks for the encouragement, guys.

For now, I will take it one day at a time, and try to have
inner strength.