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Newbie that can't breathe

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Posted 11/11/2013 9:37 PM (GMT 0)
Hello all-

Newbie here.  I have suffered from anxiety and panic attacks for about 8 or 9 years.  I have always been able to control them.  Usually got them about once a month.  My symptoms are hyperventilation.  I literally can't breathe.  Talk about scary.

They first started after a breakup about 8 or 9 years ago.  I had no idea what was happening.  Scared the utter crap out of me.  I went to therapy, got a xanax prescription and just "dealt" with them.  I only get 15 xanax pills with no refills so I only take them when absolutely necessary.  Of course I self medicate with alcohol and just pray that I don't get one. They have been "manageable"

Recently it has turned into what I have self diagnosed as panic disorder.  I used to run 6 miles a day.  I haven't been able to run for about 5 years because I can't breathe and I panic.  I can't leave the house without a bottled water, my phone, xanax, and an inhaler.  (this makes it even more difficult to run lol)

I can't even make it around the block to walk my dog without hyperventilating.  As of late, I have had a constant state of low grade panic all day every day for weeks.  I can't even sleep.  I am convinced I have sleep apnea.  Last night I gasped myself awake once an hour.  Frightening. At least sleep was an escape from the constant elephant on my chest.  Now, not so much.

I know I have to go back to therapy.  I was thinking about trying hypnosis.  I don't know, at this point I just feel so helpless.  I am  not even really stressed over anything!  I have a great life.  Just started a new job that I love. Single at 43 with no kids wasn't exactly where I thought I would be in my life, but I do love my life regardless. 

I was recently diagnosed with a large fibroid tumor.  It was benign and honestly it didn't bother me that much.  I was TERRIFIED that once I went under anesthesia I wouldn't wake up, that I would stop breathing. What if I O'D on the medication?  When I woke up in my hospital room, I had a MASSIVE attack.  I could NOT get any air in at all.  The nurse chastised me and yelled at me for knocking over my drink.  I wanted to punch her in the face.

Truly, I panic about Panic!  I am not afraid of the grocery store per say or crowds, but I have had some doozies in the grocery store or kmart.  Literally at the counter, can't breathe, hyperventilating.  I hate it!  I panic about going out to dinner or the movies.  Will I have one?  Sometimes when I take a pill, it actually escalates the attack because I think it's not going to work. I truly have too much time in my own head.  I find that if I am distracted that helps.  I worked three jobs for awhile just to escape it lol.

It's amazing to me that I can even read the forums, that usually brings it on too.  I have had two large ones in the shower this week.  I can't even go to the gym because I get them there.  I was lying on the bathroom floor at work the other day feeling myself spinning out of control.  It so very debilitating.  Everyone thinks I have it so together and most times I think while I'm sitting in meetings at work "if you only knew that I was lying on my shower floor not even able to get up this morning, you would be appalled."

I find myself thinking that I'm allergic to things and can't swallow. I eat shrimp, or peanut butter and am convinced that my throat is swelling up and do I have benadryl handy.  It is crazy, and I KNOW it's crazy.  Every day is a succession of shallow breaths.  I feel like I will never be normal.

Posted 11/11/2013 10:27 PM (GMT 0)
All is Well,

Welcome to HealingWell.  Panic disorder is a potentially disabling disorder, but can be controlled and successfully treated. Because of the intense symptoms that accompany panic disorder, it may be mistaken for a life-threatening physical illness such as a heart attack. This misconception often aggravates or triggers future attacks (some are called "anticipatory attacks"). I am very familiar with "anticipatory anxiety" attacks. 

A growing body of evidence exists that shows a link between substance abuse and panic disorder. While alcohol initially helps ease panic disorder symptoms, medium- or long-term alcohol abuse can cause panic disorder to develop or worsen.

I suspect you would benefit from a psychotherapist that  works with people who have developed severe panic attacks. 

I think I may be able to help you with your over-breathing problem. Hyperventilation is medically defined as over-breathing, or breathing in excess of what the body needs. It is usually identified by symptoms of rapid, deep breathing, and is typically brought about by panic or anxiety attacks due to extreme stress or excitement.

Hyperventilating may feel terrifying and may cause you to panic even further so let's see if I can offer some ideas on how to manage the over-breathing issue.

If you can learn this technique it will serve you well:

Practice diaphragmatic breathing, or belly breathing either while standing or lying on the floor with your knees bent.

  • Put one hand on your stomach below your ribs and the other on your chest.
  • Breathe in through your nose deeply. Let the air push your stomach out, but keep your chest still.
  • Exhale through pursed lips, and use the hand on your stomach to help push the air out slowly. Repeat 3-10 times and take your time breathing in and out.

Practice meditation and relaxation techniques. Doing so would greatly reduce the occurrences of hyperventilation episodes in the future.

We have plenty of information in our Resources at the top of the page so do check out the info and choose one to start with to help you take control over you anxiety and panic attacks. I have listed a few of our resources for you here in your thread.

Self Help sites with breathing/relaxation exercises instructions

Panic attack relief exercises:

http://www.healthyplace.com/

http://www.stress-relief-exercises.com/

http://www.ehow.com/video_4405003_breathing-exercises-panic-attacks.html

http://www.psybersquare.com/anxiety/panic_relax_I

Big breath and stick with us as we are here to support you.

Kindly,

Kitt

Posted 11/12/2013 12:00 AM (GMT 0)
Hi AIW and welcome!

Kitt has advised you well...I just wanted to say hi, and that we are glad that you have joined us.

We are here to listen, understand and care. Support is key so post often.:)

Scaredy Cat
Posted 11/12/2013 6:34 AM (GMT 0)
You have just received advice from the two best sources we know of, Please listen to them, they are like
Guardian Angles. Peace

Larry ***
Posted 11/12/2013 6:24 PM (GMT 0)
Thanks everyone.  After reading the forum, it's obvious that you all know what you're talking about:)  It's nice to come here where people know what it's like!  Very frustrating to try to talk to people about it who have no idea where you are coming from.

I do know that alcohol only makes it worse.  I will be trying some meditation and the breathing exercises.  I know it is something I need to do daily.  I just get so panicked when I am in the middle of it, that I can't even TRY to regulate my breathing.

Thanks again for the support

Posted 11/12/2013 6:34 PM (GMT 0)
Good Afternoon,

There are all sorts of reasons that people find it hard to meditate.  The most common challenge people have with meditation is  they feel they are unable to quiet the mind and keep out thoughts. “My mind just won’t stop its chatter.” “I can’t stay focused on meditation.”

The key is to stop resisting thoughts and trying to make them go away. Thoughts are a part of meditation. They are a natural activity in the mind. Although meditation can be a way to experience inner silence, this comes about not by eliminating thoughts but by becoming aware of the silence that is naturally present in the mind along with the thoughts. When we stop resisting what is naturally happening, we experience calmness and peace.

There are no good or bad experiences in meditation. There is no right or wrong way to feel. Meditation is about “letting go” and trusting the natural flow of life. It is important to remember that the goal of these meditations is not to have special experiences, but to become more at ease with whatever arises. By meditating regularly and following these guidelines, ease in meditation will grow and this will translate into greater ease in living — the ability to flow with whatever life brings.

I like this meditation video as it helps me concentrate on relaxing:

Meditation Video ( 7 minutes) :

http://www.youtube.com/user/healthealingnetwork?feature=pyv&ad=4342564202&kw=meditation&v=yHYKSYPoNg4&lr=1

Believe in yourself and know we are here for you,

Kitt

Posted 11/12/2013 7:07 PM (GMT 0)
Thanks Kitt. I guess I have more of a problem with the breathing regulation that goes along with meditation rather than the meditation itself. Whenever I try to listen to a meditation exercise, and they continually ask me to focus on my breathing or take in "deep breaths", it makes me anxious. It makes me aware of my breathing again which tends to trigger the anxiety. Yuck.
Posted 11/12/2013 8:43 PM (GMT 0)
AiW,

Here is the only breathing exercise that has ever really worked for me. I had similar issues that you described...but this one seems to really put the user in control...other than feeling helpless through the breathing process. I hope it helps you as it did me.:)

The Divided Breath:

Imagine your lungs as having 3 parts. The bottom third, the middle, and top third. On the inhale fill the bottom third first, then the middle and finally the third. Make sure that this is one continuous breath, but divided, with a slight pause in between each third. Hold the breath in for 3-5 seconds if possible. Exhale in reverse. First blow out the top third, then the middle, and finally the bottom third of your lungs until all air is expelled. (remember the pauses) Repeat several rounds for a toatal of about 10 minutes. Practicing this every day will not only give you control and structure to your breathing, it will strengthen and loosen the thoractic muscles, allowing better, more productive breathing, and relieving the chest tightness!

 

S.C.

Posted 11/12/2013 9:09 PM (GMT 0)
Thanks SC- I did read this in some of the other posts and have already printed it out! I will try it for sure.
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