craziness lately

Hello all!

I haven't been on here for awhile after my colonoscopy because I'm still waiting for my results of the biopsies. And that's making me a wreck. And then my husband had been sick, for amost 3 weeks as well as had an infected tooth, so we had that, plus job worries because they weren't accepting his doctor papers because the doctor had worded it wrong. And then of course, wouldn't fix them.

So I have been stressed to the max. But work actually worked with him, and helped him, so his job isn't in jeopardy anymore so we went out to a nice dinner to celebrate. On a Friday night, at peak time...

Not such a good idea.

I was all proud of myself for standing in the crowded lobby for a good 35-45 minutes. No panic in wall to wall people. Then we got to the table,ordered, and then the table next to my family was entertaining their young child with a very too loud cell phone playing music. Needless to say it seemed to be my trigger and it caused a panic attack the likes I haven't had in a long time. And then they kept blocking the aisles with their bins when they were clearing tables, went to the restroom several times to try to calm down...no such luck. Didn't eat hardly at all, had to ask everyone to leave, I ended up eating my dinner at my mom in laws. Once I got out of the restaurant I was fine. For awhile.

It always seems to be the noise, the lights, the enclosed spaces that get me the most. But what I am getting at, is I bought this book I'm waiting to get...Someting about HSPS? (Highly sensitive people.) And alot of the symptoms seem like what I have. Has anyone else ever heard of this, or worked on this? I'm waiting to get a workbook I can work through. Hoping they offer some kind of coping strategy. Thanks. I just needed to vent because it was bad.

Maji its no secret that they use noise of varying typs for getting
POW's to talk, anything that irritates you or your peace can be
a catalyst, don't get down on yourself it happens. My wife suffered with this for 17 years I wish I had a dollar for every
time she jumped up and ran out of a restaurant , you will be ok.
Larry ***

I can't wait to get this book in the mail, but every day the mail comes and I don't get it, it seems I get worse. xD I think this workbook will help me most definately. And maybe it will help me understand most of my triggers and then I don't know, is it better to keep away from them? Or face them?

Like the restaurant example I overcame the crowded lobby, but that woman's cell phone made me lose big time.

I also feel bad when I ask my kids to be quiet when all they're doing is being kids. x.x I want them to enjoy their childhood, after all.

Good point about the noise torture, Larry lol That's how I feel when I'm having a panic attack when my two boys go at it. I'm also wondering if leading such a quiet solitary childhood was a cause of this? I wasn't able to ever really be loud and be "Myself." Which is another reason I'm careful about how I treat my kids.

But yes, if it's allowed, when I get the book, I'll let you know which book it was and how it helped. *Crosses fingers* Waiting for some light. :)

Oh, And SC! Speaking of triggers, my back yard was nothing but a sheet of ice..and do you know..I could not will myself to try to climb down it..legs got locked and I was crying >.< I felt so pitiful xD BUt my hubby is a really sweet understanding man, he carried our six year old in the house and then came and walked me back. I feel truly blessed to have such a supportive spouse. <3

It's called "The Highly Sensitive Person's Workbook" lol Plain as day aye?

Written by someone called Elaine Aron. She also has a website. Don't know if I can post it or not. But if you do a search on her name, she has a web newsletter she wrote for a couple of years also. She's been researching this subject for many a year. :)

Thanks, Weary. Wish you all the best as well. :)

Think it was just the cell phone, the lighting, the noise...the fact they were blocking the aisles to clear the tables...and my kids. xD I love them dearly but they make so much noise constantly. lol

I mean I have never had a panic attack feel like that before. I went in the restroom and did my old reliable cold water on the forehead and back of neck, usually works. Did that twice and no luck. xD tried calming down, talking to myself...it was just too out there to reel it back in. Hoping this workbook will help when it comes >.<