Hello everyone,
Today I joined this forum so that I can talk with other people who suffer from anxiety. I am 24 yo M in my last year of pharmacy school. I have been suffering from on/off periods of anxiety since I was a freshman in high school (2004). I've been taking alprazolam 0.25 mg PRN for panic attacks since mid high school. Over the past 10 years I have gone through many different stages in my anxiety. It started with panic attacks provoked by uncomfortable situations such as being away from home, driving far distances, being out at night time, etc. This was managed with cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) as well as the alprazolam PRN. By the end of high school I was well controlled with no anxiety and rarely ever taking my alprazolam (once every few months). My undergraduate college career was pretty anxiety free as well. I mainly just took my alprazolam when I flew places (once a year) or if I happened to be on edge for some reason.
My first year of pharmacy school went well. It was big change from undergrad. I had to move to a new city, adjust to the large load of course work and expectations, etc. However, my anxiety was doing okay. During my second year I had a very bad panic attack that caused me to go to the ED (first time ever). It was provoked by marijuana use and was the first time dealing with a panic attack while being under the influence of marijuana - a very extreme experience. Since then I haven't smoked again.
The rest of my second year though was an anxious time for me. For a few weeks I was taking my alprazolam daily. Then one day I met a girl at school. We started talking for a few days and I knew that my anxiety was going be a problem when we hang out. At that point I literally told my self that I had to "get it together" if I wanted things to work out with her...and just like a flip of a switch, my anxiety disappeared. We started dating and for about
3 months I was completely anxiety free. Then I hit a stressful time in my life dealing with a personal issue that started the anxiety again here and there. I would take alprazolam sometimes, although most of the time I tried to fight it without meds.
Third year rolled around and it was a little better. I still got anxious for no reason every once and a while - mainly at night time. Again, I would only reserve the alprazolam for when I couldn't control it myself. Towards the end of my third year it seemed as if my night time anxiety was turning into a daily thing. My girlfriend and I decided that I should maybe start medication (she's a clinical pharmacist). I decided that once my schooling ended and my clinical rotations started in May that I would start medication. Of course I delayed that idea because I really didn't want to be on a daily SSRI. However, about
three weeks ago when we moved out of our apartment I experience the most extreme anxiety attack of my life. It was devastating and really caught me off guard since I haven't had a full blown panic attack since 2012. Over the past few weeks since my attack, my anxiety has been an almost daily occurrence.
After many years dealing with anxiety, it has shifted from provoked panic attacks..to being completely fine..to being on edge for no reason, etc. My symptoms when anxious have also evolved over the years. I have finally decided that I am ready to start a daily medication for my anxiety. I have an appointment today with a nurse practitioner through my schools counseling center (not preferred, but just need someone to prescribe me meds). I'm not leaving there today without a script
for Lexapro 10 mg. I am very excited to start the medication and I am hoping for little to no side effects.
My ultimate goal is to get my anxiety under control before I go on a family vacation to Disney World at the end of July. There, I plan on proposing to my girlfriend and enjoying the rides without my anxiety holding me back from riding certain ones (happened when I was there last year). Given that I have ~6 weeks before we go I think this is a very obtainable goal.
Post Edited (studentpharmacist) : 6/17/2014 10:32:03 AM (GMT-6)