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School makes me suicidal

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Posted 8/16/2014 12:04 PM (GMT 0)
Throughout this summer I've suffered waves of depression that physically drained me (due to health anxiety and panic attacks). Somewhere along the line, it all got better and it was as if a weight had been lifted, and I started feeling better about life..  But now that there's less than three weeks of summer left, all of it is coming back, and the thought of school is making me very anxious. I think I feel this way because I never really spent the summer doing anything productive, I left my friends in another city, and no one in my current town wants to hang out with me; I feel like a loser sometimes... No one even cares about me anymore. I hate the thought of school because it gets so stressful, and I get bullied a lot too. And to make matters worse, I'm torn between dropping out, and trying to finish shool, because I have no idea what i'd do for money if I actually did drop out... Can someone help me figure out what's best before I go insane? sad
Posted 8/16/2014 12:23 PM (GMT 0)
I don't know your age, but my son has anxiety attacks about school, they were SO bad he would break out into hives all over his body, the school went as far as sending him to the social worker saying he was "cutting himself", when he was merely itching the hives.

He too has been bullied beyond belief, so bad that he was punched so hard in the face that he had a huge blood blister inside his mouth and his lip was swollen very badly, the school never called me and when he came home I was shocked to see how they allowed him to stay at school without calling me, he couldn't eat lunch that day because his mouth was so sore.

My son is autistic, high functioning with other health impairments, I took him to a Psychiatrist, and ended up having to remove him from school, and amazingly the hives stopped.

Hard to give advice in a situation like you are going through, because quitting school and being home schooled may not be an option for you. The advice the school would give my son was to just ignore the bullies, that is very hard to do when you are autistic and your over stimulated by excessive noise and too many people around you.

I hope some how you can find someone that can help your through this, maybe even talking to the school counselor before you go back and letting them know your feelings.

I wish the best for you!
Posted 8/16/2014 12:28 PM (GMT 0)
That is very awful to hear, I'm glad your son is finally feeling better! And thank you for the support, it really means a lot :)
Posted 8/16/2014 12:57 PM (GMT 0)
You're very welcome, wish I could have helped your more! confused
Posted 8/16/2014 5:17 PM (GMT 0)
I would also like to add a little support to you. Remember the bully is the one that is wrong not you. Whatever they say to you, try to ignore it some people are plain soul less. You are what's important, and don't let someone else rule your life. If you drop out of school then they win. Hugs. wink
Posted 8/16/2014 5:36 PM (GMT 0)
Oh yes, I remember school... it can be such a stressful and sometimes painful experience! It may not seem like it now, but it's very temporary, and once you're finished there's a whole new world out there and you'll be armed with what you need to move onward and upward with the rest of your life.

And who knows, this year could be a fresh start. I thought it was the end of the world when my parents moved to a different state just before my senior year of high school, but it ended up being one of the best years of my life.

My best friend recently pulled her son out of school and starts homeschooling him on Monday. Not sure if that's an option for you, but if it's not, try and hang in there. Things get A LOT better and the time goes by like it's nothing.

The suggestion to talk to a counselor is a good one. You don't have to deal with things on your own.
Posted 8/16/2014 11:38 PM (GMT 0)
My daughter is in 7th grade this year, and thankfully has gotten off to a good start..she already started school on the 13th.. 6th grade was not so easy for her, and the bus had been hard too. The very first day of 6th grade she sat down at lunch to eat, and all the girls at the table got up and left. She was so devestated that day. The bus ride home, some girl was trying to rip her shirt. I had to talk to the bus driver, and thankfully it got taken care of that. The school days were harder and harder for her, as she started slacking on her grades. She is in academic classes, and almost got thrown out of them. She finally found a good friend, and that changed alot of things for her. My daughter is smart, and beautiful and talented. She is really book smart, and kids would call her a nerd, geek, etc. I reminded her to be her, and don't worry about the kids. Thankfully she is doing good so far. All I can tell you like I told her, is that when you are out of school, all of those bullies and kids who make school hard for you won't matter. Most of them end up having miserable lives. I know thats how it worked for me, because I got picked on in school too. We were poor, and the girls I went to school with now have miserable lives. Good luck to you, and go to school with your head held high...what grade are you going into?
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