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Feeling like retarded

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Posted 11/10/2014 5:23 PM (GMT 0)
Hi,

It had been a while since i posted here as i was doing well with my battle with anxiety and my fear of going crazy.

Though am now on a business trip since Saturday and feeling really miserable. Spending most of my time alone here i feel my anxiety and fears just hit the roof, i cant focus during meetings, lost my well to work and pushing myself hard to attend my appointments here, and when alone i cant stop thinking about the way am feeling and how weird i became and feeling literally like a retarded.

I sincerely have no idea what to do or if am developing any new disorder like social anxiety or something, but all what i know is that i will not survive this way at my job as am supposed to be travelling alot in the next few weeks.

Is it really normal to feel this way and how can i assure myself that nothing is mentally wrong with me. I do really appreciate your feedback about this and if its something that anyone of you have gone through before.

Thanks
Posted 11/10/2014 5:36 PM (GMT 0)
Have you seen a doctor expressing your concerns and symptoms? Are you currently treating anxiety through therapy or medication?

Traveling and business trips can certainly add to anxieties and stress.

I certainly feel anxious when I travel to client sites. It is normal to have increased stress and anxiety, however if it is effecting your work / quality of life I recommend talking to your doctor. I take Zoloft and it has helped make my anxiety more manageable.
Posted 11/10/2014 10:19 PM (GMT 0)
Not sure if I ever felt like a "retarded"... Probably not the best choice of words as alot of us has loved ones who are handi-capped (mentallly and physically). But I have been disorientated from this disorder.. I can totally relate with you about losing motivation and not being focused.

It's impossible to be 100% on your game 24/7.... Consider this a rough patch... You will get through this!

Now is the time to incorporate your coping skills and healthy distractions. You did the right thing by coming on here and seeking support.

I'm sure you will get alot more input from our wonderful members... I encourage you to apply it. I'll say it again...you will get through this!

Sending you Healing thoughts!

Cornell

Post Edited (Cornell) : 11/10/2014 3:23:14 PM (GMT-7)

Posted 11/11/2014 3:31 AM (GMT 0)

M.,

I am sorry that you are having a rough time of it currently.

Traveling can cause the Anxiety/OCD scale to tip for certain!  Here are some great links with worksheets that will help you work through these fears.  Take a look and give them a try.

 

I hope that  you get through the rest of your travels comfortably.

 

Le us know how you are doing soon!

 

S.C.

Self Help Printable Work Book for OCD and Intrusive Thoughts

http://www.moodjuice.scot.nhs.uk/obsessioncompulsion.asp

 

Therapy Work Sheets:

http://www.get.gg/freedownloads2.htm

Posted 11/11/2014 12:28 PM (GMT 0)
Hi,

Thanks for your replies. Maybe i have miss used the word, what i meant is that am feeling like a naive person. I do have a full respect and support to all handicapped people.

The thing is that i feel that I these days lack of self esteem and confidence more than ever which is not helping at work, in addition i keep on feeling like a naive when talking to people i dont know and keep watching what i say and how i behave which is making me nervous.
Posted 11/11/2014 4:14 PM (GMT 0)
M.,

I am normally a really confident person...my job depends on it...

...but if my anxiety is high, my confidence can falter somewhat.

Focus on using anxiety management skills, so you lower your stress, and feel self assured.:)

S.C.
Posted 11/12/2014 7:47 PM (GMT 0)
Hi,

Another miserable day, i had one of the worst headaches ever, i had no well to do anything and was pushing myself to attend my meetings and talk to people as i feel i lost my well to do anything, i cant stop thinking about every single thing i say or do and cant stop feeling that there is something wrong with my mind or stop questioning my sanity.

I wonder where i will end up being with this and what is gonna happen to me next. Now adays my only goal is to survive the day and make sure no one around notice that am not being normal, living life this way is really tough i wish i can get my anxiety back to its normal levels or even stop questioning my sanity and feeling like a really naive person although my meetings went well but i cant even assure that to myself!
Posted 11/12/2014 8:43 PM (GMT 0)
M.,

I'm sorry.:(

Spend some time when you can with those resources I posted above.

Also, I was thinking maybe some self-help for social anxiety could be of help? Are you interested in some material on that? Let me know, and I will look some up and post for you.

S.C.
Posted 11/12/2014 8:58 PM (GMT 0)
Morif,

Since you're aware of feeling crazy, you're not. I can also guarantee no one notices you're acting differently. I've had these symptoms for years and no one knows unless I tell them. I can assure you 100% you're not crazy and no one else thinks so.

When you can, visit your psychologist/psychiatrist and talk about your fears. Also I would recommend diphramactic breathing in your alone time. You can get through it :)
Posted 11/14/2014 9:44 PM (GMT 0)
Hi

I've been back from my business trip but unfortunately my struggle still didn't come to an end.

Since I've been back I can't stop analyzing every word I say and finding it hard to communicate with people even the ones close to me. To add more pain my self esteem is it's lowest and can't really appreciate anything am doing or did. I even can't stop analyzing everything I say or do.

Unfortunately I can't afford to see a counselor at the mean time or to buy the SNRI prescribed by my phsycaterist (currently only using my benzos which are not being much of help.

I wish I can know if am developing a social anxiety or it's just a new game my anxiety is playing on me as I never had any problem communicating with people and my self esteem was always at an acceptable level.

I wish someone can relate to this of even share his thoughts.

Thanks
Posted 11/14/2014 10:10 PM (GMT 0)
I would just like to address something brought up....the use of the word "retarded." I don't know why but it's got a bad rap and stigma. Yet it's used, quite literally, in many facets. It simply means "slowed down." If a growth halts, that growth has retarded. So in that respect, I just wanted to clear the air.

If you're feeling "slowed down" like you're not grasping information, it could be......(wait for it),..........you're pooped out! Perhaps you've been overworking, overthinking, overprocessing, overanalyzing, and just overdoing it in so many different ways that your body is trying to send you a message that you just need to take a little break from all the over-what-cha-ma-call-its, and take some good "ME-time" and decompress?

I mention this because, as it happens, my personal/private clock seems synched up to that of our AP members as usual....and I've been going through some health concerns, and I feel like I've curled up like a turtle (shout out to Jamie!).....just overwhelmed. And when that happens, I lose touch, can't pick up on things, I can't seem to learn or process info....

Call that what you may, but I can relate to the essence of that feeling.....





M.
Posted 11/14/2014 10:13 PM (GMT 0)
Good input by Merrida!

In case you do want to check out some info and help with social anxiety...to determine if you are dealing with any characteristics thereof...here are some links...

http://www.moodjuice.scot.nhs.uk/shynesssocialphobia.asp

http://psychcentral.com/lib/6-ways-to-overcome-social-anxiety/00017631

 

Posted 11/14/2014 11:31 PM (GMT 0)
Hi,

Thanks a lot for the help and support you are providing, indeed it's too much helpful.

The thing is that before I had my first panic attack my anxiety was mainly related to health issues which I was able to deal with to a certain extent, but am finding it heart to deal with the mentally-related fears.

Being a considerate and caring person, I find it hard to have troubles communicating with people I love and feel am letting them gone by not being able to communicate with them the way I used to and afraid to let anyone notice any change and getting worried.

Perhaps the pressures am experiencing financially, at work level (being stuck at a job I no more like and can't find other) is not helping but I wish I will be able one day to beat my anxiety or at least bring it to it's level before suffering the panic attack.
Posted 11/14/2014 11:45 PM (GMT 0)
Moriff

I know exactly how you feel about "over-analyzing" every word that you say. I had terrible social anxiety when I was younger until my mid-20's. Even to this day, I will still get a case of it.

When I talked to people (strangers and even family) I would sweat and begin to stutter. I obsessed about how I sounded. Just curious - how old are you? I ask because I actually grew out of my social anxiety.

The worst thing you can do is withdraw yourself from "social situations". Consider it "practice" anytime you are in conversation with someone. Let me tell you that people do NOT overly judge you or think poorly of you if you stammer or use the wrong word (just as long as you are minding your manners - I wouldn't reccommend offensive phrases or curse words)... The moment I learned this, it set me free (if you will). Don't put pressure on yourself when you "speak". Let the words form in your mind before you "open your mouth".... Don't rush your sentences! (Another nervous habit of mine)

You CAN overcome this! Heck, if I can do it anyone can! Eventually, you will become more and more comfortable speaking with people...

I hope things get easier for you... Know that you have a family here on HW that will support and encourage you 24/7!

Praying for you!

Cornell

PS... Merrida, as always I highly value your input! But we will agree to disagree on this one since you brought it up... I didn't take it in which the context you presented. Some words are just offensive when used in certain terms - dont want to beat a dead horse! Sorry if I misunderstood you Moriff..LOL. It won't be the first time or the last but I will continue to "speak up" - something else that came to me as I get older. With much love ;)

Post Edited (Cornell) : 11/14/2014 4:59:03 PM (GMT-7)

Posted 11/15/2014 12:41 AM (GMT 0)
I think that traveling a lot can cause stress and anxiety in anyone..but, I do think there is some social anxiety, which I can definitely relate to. I've gotten better, but I still get quiet in groups of people.
Posted 11/15/2014 1:55 PM (GMT 0)
The thing is that I always had a social anxiety but never had any trouble in business meetings or when dealing with close people. Now am feeling that there is a barrier that prevents me from talking to my family which is causing me a lot of pain.

I also feel like am becoming more of a dumb person and my self esteem and confidence are falling down and making it hard for me to accomplish anything. Can someone relate to what am passing through?
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