Anxiety really damaging my valie of life

Ive posted on hwre a couple times and everytime it makes me feel a bit better talking to people dealing with the same thing. Ive had a really rough couple of days just coming to terms that in fact anxiety is making me.feel this terrible.

Ive been unemployed since january and ever since than ive developed a crazy anxiety/panic problem
It started off as just normal panic attacks and i grew custom to them for a bit and would only last like an hour or so and i would kind of snap out of it.

Now months later i have panic attacks but on top of that ive grown this really weird sense of reality where i think im always on the verge of something. Its hard to explain everything feels weird and anything going on with i feel like are warning signs of sonething. Im researched everything from heart failure, to Lyness Disease and at one point in time have considered that was happening to me.

To me its hard accepting its just anxiety just cuz of all the actual physical symptoms im having it just feels like something is wrong. I rarely have times of clear mindedness where i can just enjoy whats in front of me without thinki g of whats going on i side of me.

The only medicines i take are Benzos and ive grown a tollerance for.them but they do help. Its honestly the only time where i feel like the normal me. I have moments where my pulse and bp are sky high and i fear what damamge its doing my body. I feel bloated and gasy all the time which give me abdomen and chest pains. I have random twitches and muscle spasms all over my body, tinnitus, alot of tenseness amd pressure just in neck and head goin all the way down to the center of my chest. Every doctor i see just says anxiety is the cause and doesn't wanna do any further testing. I was sent to a cardiologist after a hospitalization where my heart rate was at 135 and continued to fluctuate above 100 bpm. Cardiologist says everything is fine tho after a echo and looping recorder monitor. I just dont know what to do anymore. Everytime i have a good day the next four days are equally or more bad. I just dont feep like myself and feel like im in a daze and constantly just dazing through life.

I just always getut this feeling of impending doom wheb i think of the future aand think of hospitals and death. Its litwrally what i would deacribe at ptsd but its more of fear of events in the neat future that i think will happen. There always bad and ia lways have a sense of hopelessness and disparity associated with life now and its driving me insane.

Would you rather know your dying or think your dying from the inside out?

MattWarren said...


I just always getut this feeling of impending doom wheb i think of the future aand think of hospitals and death. Its litwrally what i would deacribe at ptsd but its more of fear of events in the neat future that i think will happen. There always bad and ia lways have a sense of hopelessness and disparity associated with life now and its driving me insane.

This.

This is the bane of my anxiety existence.

Here's to hoping both of us will find resolution and comfort!