So Sad - Fear Really Ruins My Life

If I weren't so afraid of everything, I'd be in Florida right now with my parents. I have the week off, it is my last spring break, but the thought of getting on a plane is so stressful that I'm not going to go. I hate that I miss out on so many things. It makes me so mad at myself.

I just keep telling myself, just do it. Get on the plane. But, then my chest gets tight and I can't breathe and I think of being trapped on a plane and I just can't. My thoughts of "what if" are like reality to me.

The last time I traveled by plane was 9 years ago when we went to the Bahamas. I haven't been on a plane since. My husband gets mad at me because there are places he wants to go, and I just can't commit to it. I missed going to a conference with my friends because I couldn't get on a plane. I'm terrified that a job I get in the future will require going to conferences in other states. What will I do?

I know people use meds, but I'm afraid to be "out of it" if I have my son with me. I feel like I need to be aware of what is going on if something happens. How will I protect him if I'm incapacitated??

Thanks for reading this.

Aw, I'm sorry you didn't make it to FL!!

There are definitely some tips for dealing with panic while flying. I had to try practicing some myself on the flight home from Hawaii. Some were pretty silly actually!

I grew up flying a few times a year but as I've gotten older it has become a real problem for me. I started taking Xanax for flights years ago and that was actually the only time I took it. If you do find you're interested in trying that at some point, I would suggest asking your doctor for a small prescription (like 6) of a benzo and then trying the dose at home. Contrary to what a lot of people believe, a benzo does not have to turn you into a zombie. I take a tiny dose and it simply makes me feel....well....not anxious I guess. Most of the time I take my Xanax and forget I took it, but I just don't become panicky in the hours after that dose.

S.C. is right though. You've been rocking everything this past couple years and making it through school, etc. Don't be too hard on yourself, but don't deprive yourself either! Hugs!

I think you'd be surprised by how many people have a fear of flying for one reason or another, so it sounds like you're pretty normal to me!

Try not to be too hard on yourself. I know that feeling of being a bad spouse sometimes. It's rough, but it's not true! You're doing the best you can with a lot on your plate!

Plan something fun and special to do locally...or doable with a short road trip.

If you stay focused on the limitations, your mood will sink lower and your break will be a bummer.

However, if you resolve to focus on fun you can have with the time you have left...and make the best of a staycation...I bet you won't regret it.:)

I know it hard to get out of a funk...been there for sure. Just try to take that first step towards the positive...

S.C.

Miss,

I am scared to fly too. I've only flown a hand full of times, though I've never used Xanax to fly. But, if I had to fly tomorrow, I would totally HAVE to use it.

I believe flying had to be the number one fear. it's a pretty common fear. But for anxiety sufferers, it's just one more fear on top of the fear pile. I can totally understand why it is frustrating.

Thank you so much you everyone. I do think that maybe xanax might be something I need to try for flying. I'm sick of missing out on things.

It does make me feel better to know that you all have felt the same way I do. Blu, you pretty much sound like me. Although, the last time I flew involved copious amounts of alcohol and I was a little better. I just can't do that when I'm traveling with my son, you know?

I'm trying not to get too upset with myself. I keep seeing pictures of friends on the beach on facebook and it's hard not to be mad at myself. My brother and his wife are heading to Playa del Carmen next month...without their kids!! What?? I could never imagine that. Sounds wonderful, but I would never relax. Ugh, the joys of worrying about EVERYTHING!!