So a few weeks ago I had already posted about
feeling scared of a pain I had in my leg. Well, the meds worked and I don't feel pain anymore, and I had actually been able to stop thinking about
it too much and do daily activities normaly.
But last week I think I slept on my knee and the discomfort started all over again. I feel my muscle twitches, I feel discomfort in my knee like I can't keep it in the same position for too long, and I keep thinking something could be wrong but I keep telling myself if it were anything serious after so long it wouldn't have just stayed with a knee discomfort. And then I started looking up my symptoms and I saw all these illness and suddenly I feel as if I fit a lot of them and now I don't know if these symptoms are real but I feel as if every now and then I get these little symptoms that fit into one thing and then next they fit into another.
Although I keep telling myself that the discomfort in my knee going away is a sign that it was just something in my knee, I keep thinking maybe it's actually a sign that it has moved to another place, and I started checking my pulse and counting my breaths and checking my legs even though the discomfort stops when I apply a lotion my doctor had recommended the first time I went for a visit. I feel I have been controlling my breaths and I think what if I'm taking shorter breaths and I haven't even noticed because I didn't used to concentrate on my breaths.
I keep fearing that it might be something bad. I feel very scared. Today I had to help in a play with the props and even though no one in the public was ever going to see me because I was going to be behind the curtains just handing out props and
opening and closing the curtains, I felt I was shaking, I felt like I wanted to throw up then I worried I might throw up and everyone at school would remember me as the one who threw up and wasn't even in the play. I hadn't felt so scared since my last year of middle school. I am almost out of high school now.
I want to go for a second visit to the doctor, but I don't know if my symptoms are real or just my brain. This happened to me before, I felt pressure on my temple and for weeks thought I had something in my brain that would pop any second, but I don't know if this worry is serious or just meaningless worry anymore.
I can't even leave my house worrying something bad might happen. Like, I can't leave without thinking maybe I will get sick in the middle of the road or that I might fall in the store.
The only time of the day I can actually relax is when I'm sleeping or watching a movie or talking with my family and I completely forget all about
it, but then it all comes back again and I can't take it anymore! I'm so tired of this!
Should I go for that second doctor's visit? Even though my knee is actually improving? I mean, if it would've been something bad my knee wouldn't have stayed with the discomfort and it wouldn't have improved, right? I'm sleepy, tired, but I always am when I'm at school, and in the mornings. What can I do??
Post Edited (BlaiddDrwg) : 4/5/2016 8:46:36 PM (GMT-6)