Struggling to get help

I'm not sure if it's okay to post here. I know technically stress disorders are now their own category, separate from anxiety disorders, but the PTSD site where I usually post is down for a week and counting for updating & I am falling apart.

I had a really rough therapy session last week & went to seek support online only to find out that the online service was indefinitely suspended. I have been really struggling with flashbacks & intrusive thoughts. The doctors think I may have had several severe panic attacks this week (I did not feel anxious at all like a normal panic attack -- normally I feel terrified -- but did have all the other symptoms & they couldn't find a physical cause for them; I felt totally calm, but couldn't catch my breath, my heart was racing, I got dizzy and ran into walls & so forth).

I really wish they would finish updating that support site I like. I am not sleeping much & am on edge almost all the time. I had been doing SOOOO much better -- wasn't scanning the room looking for dangerous people, could deal with some unsettling emotions without panicking & turning to self-harm to distract myself, was working 3-4 days a week, wasn't breaking out in stress hives every other day, and was even able to talk with my therapist & the State's attorney (who is bringing charges against the criminal who gave me PTSD) about the distressing criminal acts that were committed against me with a tolerable amount of anxiety.

But right now it just seems like everything has "gone off the rails", so to speak. Not doing well with work, freezing in a state of panic, and spending a lot of energy just on avoiding harmful behaviors. My psychiatrist is having me try Buspar. I'm pretty nervous about that because I don't tolerate many medications well. I just don't know how I'm going to get through this. I am so incredibly miserable.

Thanks, SC. It was actually an MD that was using those relaxation techniques that assaulted me, so they end up sending my anxiety through the roof when I hear them. It's one of the few things that I've never gotten past as far as stress/anxiety triggers so I avoid them like the plague.

I'm overdue for my final PTSD shot, but my doc is on vacation so it will just have to wait a bit longer. Hopefully, I can get that soon because I know it made a night-and-day difference in my mental health. Within 20 minutes of getting the shot, I was feeling calm, focused, and happy. Unfortunately, they're not covered by most insurance, so I have been saving up since May (when I was due to have my latest round).

I'm really not so keen on psych meds. Early on, I kept getting misdiagnosed with depressive & anxiety disorders (always with NOS added on) and was given all sorts of meds that just made things worse. Getting the right diagnosis definitely helped & I was doing so much better for a while. I'm so discouraged over this setback, though, that I finally caved in & agreed to try the Buspar. I wish it would help so I can function again. This flare-up of the stress/anxiety is really taking me down.

No, it's fine you mentioned it. Hearing about it is okay. In fact, I even tried to do some deep breathing earlier, but it turned into a total nightmare.

Talking or chatting with people helps. Usually designing my quilts helps, often watching TV helps ... but those things have been triggering upsetting memories recently so I'm not sure what to do. Admittedly, I kinda got overly panicked when I ran out of things to try. I found a Rape Crisis Chat just now & we came up with the solution to go to a different Emotions Anonymous group than my regular one. It's 45 minutes away, but I know that really helps to get my emotional life back on track & to feel encouraged and supported by other people who struggle with anxiety, depression and/or stress disorders. :)

The "PTSD block" or "PTSD shot" is a series of injections, typically given in combination with PRF. Back in the 50's, they tried it for "depression" and "anxiety" with mixed results. In the past decade or so, it has been brought back specifically as a treatment for stress disorders (ASD/PTSD) with more consistent success. It is an injection in the neck (modified Stellate Ganglion block administered at C6, unilaterally on the right side with 2cc's of 2% lidocaine & 7cc's of 0.5% bipivucaine). Researchers found it tends to last longer when followed 7-30 days later by a Pulsed Radio Frequency treatment at the same site. Combined, those make one round. Patients may require up to 3 rounds over a period of 24 months to achieve lasting relief.

It has been found to be successful in 72% of patients (which is practically a miracle when you consider the success rates of alternative treatments like psych meds or therapies), providing an average of 80% relief in symptoms, typically beginning within the first 30 minutes after the injection. The initial treatments do not last long, but with each treatment, the length of relief gets longer. The VA has approved this as a treatment for veterans with PTSD, but Medicare & most private insurers do not yet cover it for PTSD (the non-modified SGB treatment is on-label for reflex sympathetic dystrophy -- a chronic pain disorder; so many anesthesiologists & pain specialists are trained in administering it). With that first shot, my score on the Beck's Depression Inventory went from 23 points down to 9 points on Day 1. My score on the CAPS-5 that measures PTSD went from bordering on a Level 4 (extreme) -- the highest level -- down to a low Level 2 (moderate). Further treatments reduced my BDI score to a 2 and my CAPS-5 level down to a low Level 1 (mild; considered to be sub-clinical).

It was honestly like a miracle. I mean, who has heard of treatments for stress that have an almost non-existent side effect profile & kick in within the first 30 minutes. I really hope & pray that insurance companies will start covering this life-saving treatment. My doctor -- who is also my pain specialist -- gave me a very reduced price on the treatments. He did not charge me at all for his time because he knew I'm struggling financially & really felt that I would probably successfully commit suicide without the treatment (I probably would have; I was really in bad shape). So he only charges me $275 for the SGB injections & $600 for the PRF treatments. It's an enormous amount of money, but far less than what his colleague, who is the primary researcher of this treatment in the US, charges. The researcher, Dr. Eugene Lipov, at one point quoted me $1,000 per injection (the PRF's would be significantly more). I still would have paid that amount, but due to a congenital disorder with my neck, he would not accept me as his patient for the PTSD blocks.

Still, it was Dr. Lipov's ground-breaking research that my doctor used to develop his treatment plan. He worked with my mental health team to measure treatment outcomes. The research has shown that in stress disorders, unlike anxiety disorders, the Stellate Ganglion nerve is damaged. In patients with stress disorders, an unusually high amount of Nerve Growth Factor is present in the blood, causing the Stellate Ganglion nerve to grow a bunch of extra branches. Each of those branches, like the main branch of the nerve, releases adrenaline. So, when something that should produce a teeny tiny amount of stress occurs -- like seeing a person enter the room out of the corner of your eye -- each branch of the SG nerve releases adrenaline, resulting in a flood of adrenaline in the brain equivalent to what might be released if you find yourself tied to train tracks with a speeding train approaching from the right and a hungry cheetah coming at you from the left. The PTSD block basically "disables" all those extra branches of the SG nerve, resetting your system so it only releases adrenaline from the main branch. They've actually measured the adrenaline levels in patients 30 minutes after treatment & found that, indeed, adrenaline levels drop by 60-80%.

Patients still need to continue with counseling to process through the trauma, but it's much easier to do so when your brain isn't flooded with adrenaline. Patients with low-moderate to mild levels of PTSD generally can complete counseling within 6 months of finishing the PTSD blocks. Very little research has been done on those with higher levels of PTSD, so I'm a little bit of a guinea pig as far as how much longer I'll need to attend therapy after my final round of blocks, but my counselor is hopeful that it probably will be less than 2 years. The main difficulty is that most of the relaxation techniques that would normally help me are triggers. As I heal, we work on slowly reintroducing parts of the techniques similar to what they do with exposure therapy for phobias. I used to fly into a panic just after hearing the word "breathe" or "take a breath", but now I do okay with hearing those words. It's a much longer & slower process than I would have liked, but little by little, I'm mostly moving forward.

This is just a really, really crummy week. I really appreciate your support. It helps to not feel like I'm all alone & crazy.

I am also PTSD diagnosed .

My memory is terrible,cognitive decline,flashbacks.

I have only psychiatrist,because of financial troubles I do not go for counseling.
I do not like to talk about my past anymore.
My anxiety levels are terrible to a point that my BP is increased. Now my heart is getting affected I know.
I try to stay focused ,and go slow.
Pls feel free to talk here,as I am here all the time .
Hope you will feel better !