depersonalisation

Hi everyone

I have dp and have so on and off since the age of 15 after having surgery.

I recently have had a bad bout of this and symptoms include

tinnitus

feeling of unreality

Present feels like distant pass e.g the other day i was in town with my hubby and 2 kids i went to one shop with my son and my hubby took our daughter but less than a couple of minutes after leaving my hubby i could not for the life of me remember if he had my daughter with him i instantly felt sick and panicky

Poor memory/concentration, struggle to follow conversation etc

emotionally/physically numb

fatigue

headaches

de ja vu feelings

unable to focus properly find it difficult to read etc

staring spells

off balanced feeling

These are the main symptoms but i feel completely in my own world if feels horrendous this is the worst period of dp ive ever been through and it is extremely hard to cope day in day out with it can anyone relate to the above symptoms ive mentioned above??

The only relief i get from this is to go to bed to sleep  i have it 24 7 with no let up i hope that in time it will subside again.

I always think that i have a serious illness such as a brain tumor this is because to feel this horrendous and it not been something seriously wrong feels very odd how can you feel so bad and it be just a form of anxiety i dont understand it.  I wouldnt wish my worst enemy to feel this way when you try to explain to others they just look at you as though youre going mad you cant explain it unless you have been through it this forum is great support and help to others everyone take care you will get through it you just have to stick with it take a day at a time it will pass xx

 

Post Edited (jostar) : 8/28/2008 6:52:33 AM (GMT-6)

Hi Julie

Thank you for your quick response i had a hip operation when i was younger and i do put that down to them giving me too much aneasthetic i just could come round from it couple of days later the dp set in, although at the time i didnt know what the hell was happening.

My doc thinks im depressed and ive been on citalopram 30mg for 18 months although i did try to come off it but was feeling real bad again so went back to 30mg the meds have helped me with anxiety but the anxiety is only there because of the dp.

Not sure about the ear thing maybe a possibility thanks for your reply

jodie

Hi Peacesoul

Yes ive had mri full bloods etc i think its just anxiety its just hard to get your head around when you feel so bad.  I think that their must be something seriously wrong why do i feel so ill with it all but deep down the most disturbing issue is the depersonalisation as thats chronic at the moment i get no relief at all only when i go to sleep and more often than not im in bed early most nights to escape this horrendous condition.  Thanks for the reply

Jodie

Hi I am new here an I read your post jostar, and I have been searching to find someone that feels like I do... Of course I have been diagnose BP but I really feel as though anxiety is destroying my life. I totally get your dpersonalization although until recently I hadn't even realized it existed. I feel more days than not totally out of my own body, I stumble and feel unbalanced all of the time to the point where I don't work and hardly leave the house anymore. It is scary and I get racing horrendous thoughts really bad on days when its worse than others. Its a nearly every day all day experience for me and has spun me into a major agitated depression and is quickly becoming unbearable. I have totally isolated myself from people and any kind of social life due to the fact that I constantly feel not me and an impending sense of doom and almost like im not even alive but Im not sure where I go. i sit and just stare and it feels like often there's not any thoughts or theyre so fast and fuzzy that it just makes me almost catatonic. I know my bf i getting fed up I mean how do you deal with people like us??? How can anyone possibly understand that hasn't experienced it? I am having a terrible time getting in to a doc and I have no meds left other than some cymbalta which seems to be making me just feel more gone .... I try to exercise when I can but often I will have panic attacks once I start that im having a heart attack. Its so unbelievably ridiculous yet its real and it's happening all day and is destroying my life as well as yours.... What do doctors do for depersonalization and do you think this sounds like it and could it be triggered by major life events? Only as of the past year have I really experienced what seems to be depersonalization. What is the deal with it?

hi ddd
therapy is one way to go ive been on meds from the docs been on citalopram 30mg for 18 months and that has done wonders to settle most of my anxiety symptoms including racing thoughts nightmares all anxiety symptoms that you can think of i went through it. This took a good year on meds patience trying to become more active and fill your day with things to do being positive aswell. This recent bout of dp just hit me from nowhere i dont really know why ive been diagnosed recently with sinusitis maybe thats it i dont know. I too try to explain this feeling to my family etc but they just dont have a clue the only ones who have had their own personal experience with it fully understands you thats why these websites i feel are so helpful. DP is defo linked with anxiety no doubt about it ive had it from being around 15 years old but this is the worst ive had it ive also had alot of stress past 18 months to and that also can contribute to all this i fully understand what you are going through ive been there but believe me their is light at the end of the tunnel you just need to take a day at a time patience and be strong its not easy but you will get there just give it time 
Take care jostar