Please tell me the truth...

I have worked very hard to overcome many obstacles in my life from teenage drug abuse, dx with Crohns disease early 20's, being totally dependent on family & boyfriend to going back to school, having a career in health care field, owning my own home by myself, even rescuing my pet at age 37.  Then married to my husband for the past 2 years, going on disability due to CD, MD/GAD & many other health complications.  When I was on my own & completly independent I felt emotional great, even with the physical issues.  I am very open minded, but with high anxiety.  Everything bugs me & my husband who is not "well rounded" and has some health issues but won't do anything about them.  Well, I try to better myself every minute of the day & its starting to make me feel insecure being with him, money mgt, etc.  He doesn't understand the GAD & of course thinks he's just great the way he is.  I have zero children & he has 2 girls 18 & 22nd & maniputive exwife. He doesn't understand how hard fitting into his life. OK my point, don't think he's doing enough to better himself of teach life lessons to the kids, he's a push over.  I feel like I'm parenting him & its getting toxic.  Any suggestions other than flying the coupe?  Its so much easier when people take care or try to take care of themself.  Does this make sense?  Help

Thanks Skitt, I didn't know you responded to me.  I am going to discuss these ?'s with my therapist & then the hubby.  We had a long talk & I stood my ground on issues that I must stand by to make me feel better.  Thank you very much.  God Bless. 

Thanks Green Grove, we are working things out so both of us are happy.  Sometimes we wife's just have to sit on our hands & let the husbands do the work with us taking the chance its for the best of us.  Its funny how they all of a sudden know how to make decisions & take care of things when us wifey's don't do it.  Thats my problem, I'm a caregiving type of person & have a degree in Occupational Therapy which trains us to assist people to be independent.  I now have to apply those principle to the home life.  Like I said "sit on my hands" & wait it out.  Thanks again, have a blessed day.

Thank you.  I read all the posts everyday, I don't post much cuz my head just spins so much I can't focus too much.  I'm having a good day today.  Thanks again for all of your support.