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Getting through therapy-but some dont agree?

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Anxiety & Panic Disorders
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Posted 4/15/2009 5:31 PM (GMT 0)
I have been in therapy for almost a year and my anxiety and depressed have decreased tremendously. I am actually still somewhat depressed, btu I feel such a happier person and I feel like I can do so much more than I could when I suffered from so much anxiety.

Now that I realize some people in my life may consciously or unconsciously been taking advantage of me. All my friends know that I'm quiet and some of the closer ones know I've been battling actual anxiety. Some of these friends are so used to just making all the decisions and basicaly having all the control, that now that I feel like I've gained some control,they dont like it.(((if this makes sense))).

I can make decisions now. I can speak for myself now. I can stand up for and defend myself now. I no longer need my friends' help. But I think some of them see that as me being selfish and taking over. I dont feel its wrong that I can be my own person but they loved having control over me. I dont want to be taken advantage of anymore. How can I get these friends to realize that I've accomplished something by overcoming anxiety and can be my own person without them making all my decisions anymore?

Posted 4/15/2009 5:44 PM (GMT 0)
Taryn, I would say let them read your post. You can print it up. Your post says it all. If these friends truly care, they will be happy that you are feeling better. They will be happy that you want to take more control of your life. These friends will step back and remain your friends no matter what.

If they do not remain your friends, than move on. You don't need negative people around you at this point, or ever. The negativity will slow down your progress and may actually cause setbacks.

Personally, I'm very happy that you're feeling so good! All the power to ya, Sweetie! Hang in there and continue to heal!
Posted 4/15/2009 5:54 PM (GMT 0)
Sometimes when people get control they don't like to let go of it. Do express your thanks for them being there during your difficult times, but let them know that you are doing much better now, and need less assistance.

I agree with Aries that if they don't want to remain as your friend on those conditions, then they really aren't the kind of friends you really need.

Continue to keep up the good work. Keep us posted on how you are doing.

Hugs
Gail *Nanners*
Posted 4/15/2009 6:12 PM (GMT 0)
Taryn,

First, I'm proud of you for sticking with a treatment that has been helping you.

Your friends - the true ones and the users - are likely having a little difficulty adjusting to the new dynamics in your relationships. I agree that if they genuinely care about you, and not about how their dealings with you (i.e., control) make them feel, then they'll truly listen as you describe how you've improved and what you want of your close relationships. Those who cannot let go of their control issues are somewhat "toxic" and will take some of the wind out of your sails right when you need it most. They may not even do it deliberately, but they should be willing to stop if they truly care.

Good luck!
percycat
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