Posted 2/12/2010 10:33 PM (GMT 0)
Hello and thank you for reading this. I am writing this message in hopes to get this off of my chest and I hope to find that I am not the only person who has been down this path…
I hope that this will not be too long, last summer I was exposed to a pesticide and I developed Panic Attacks out of the blue. I went to see a GP and they gave me .25mg of and 20mg of citroplam. I was informed that I would not be prescribed alazopram unless I was put on an antidepressant. I had no history of Depression in my life and up until that week I had never had anxiety of any form. The GP did not even ask me if I had been near anything out of the ordinary nor did I think to mention the pesticide. I started taking the meds, but I continued to get worse culminating in me being rushed to the emergency room. After going to the emergency I looked into what had changed prior to the attacks. That is when I thought of the pesticide that I had been getting all over my skin. I stopped using it and in couple of days I stopped having the attacks.
However, since the attacks I had a very increased level of anxiety. Some of the simplest of things made me nervous. I started seeing a counselor and even weaned myself off of the citroplam (Which is a MAJOR pain). I had being doing great. Very rarely needing the .25 of alazopram. I even had gone over a month with out needing any meds of any kind.. I must say ever sine I came off the citroplam I am more emotional and have more feelings then I ever did before and I actually like it.
Unfortunately this past Friday when people started talking about the major storm coming at the northeast I started getting worked up. Over the weekend with the snow coming in and the power failing and such I have been a wreck. I even had to have an emergency phone session with my counselor. Now I fear that I have fallen back to how I was before..
What I am wondering is has anyone ever experienced panic attacks induced by exposure to a Neurotoxin (pesticide)? Does a back slide mean that I am getting worse? Does it take a long time to get over the attacks? I am just afraid of having another one. I have found certain situations will make me more nervous. Keep in mind, prior to this I had nerves of steel and rarely was scared or upset by anything. Do people ever get back to 100% or will I be like this forever?
Thank you for reading this long-winded story. I look forward to your thoughts.