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Could I still have PTSD?

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Posted 4/27/2010 5:31 PM (GMT 0)
When I was a kid, I had been diagnosed with PTSD... but I don't think I ever really got treated for it... I mean... My grandma used to take me to a psychiatrist all the time, but I never talked other than to say that I was "fine..."

I haven't really resolved all of the trauma that has happened to me in the past (and there's been quite a few traumatic incidents that I've went through over the years)... And I wonder if its really starting to effect my life now? Because I've been having frequent episodes of severe depression... I'll get better for a while, but then, I'll start sliding back down again (It's starting right now; I have an appointment with a therapist that works here on campus tomorrow)... I just can't seem to get a grip... I have trouble dealing with day to day activities... and I really don't understand why this is happening now... at such an intense level... I mean, before I reached college and everything, I would have periods of depression... and I used to have anxiety attacks and such... but when I got better, I would stay better for a few years, at least... Now, it's like every couple of months is a crisis situation...

I mean... I had thought that the diagnosis didn't apply to me anymore... Because I don't have nightmares every night like I used to when I was a kid... but looking at it, now... It seems like I still do have a lot of symptoms...

I just don't know what to do anymore...
Posted 4/27/2010 6:41 PM (GMT 0)
Celey,

My sister in law was in a car crash over 32 years ago that ended with my MIL (her Mom) passing and her two oldest kids being severely burned over their entire bodies. This was not her fault at all, they were hit by a drunk driver.

Recently her depression and anxiety were WAY out of control and the Ativan she had been taking for years no longer was helping her. They put her on Lexapro about 6 mos ago and what a difference everyone see's in her.

The reason I tell you that story is, that even 32 years later she still is suffering with PTSD from the accident. So it could very well be that yours is still there in the recesses of your mind and causing the repeat depression and anxiety.

I am glad you are able to see the councelor soon. Be sure to tell her/him everything and I am sure they will help you to get back onto the right track.

Sending healing prayers your way.

Hugs
Gail*Nanners*
Posted 4/27/2010 8:12 PM (GMT 0)
That's a very sad story...

32 years?

I don't want to deal with this for that long... I want it to be over with...
Posted 4/27/2010 8:26 PM (GMT 0)
pstd intrudes when you are vernable, it is a sad fact that whenever one is vernerable one should go in for PTSD no matter how long it has been, it happens with vets all the time when they get sick, I know you want it to be over, but unfortunately it is about being proactive in treatment of it, so you can develop the coping skill to help beat it back.
Posted 4/27/2010 9:58 PM (GMT 0)
I am seeking treatment... I'm hoping to put a stop to it before I start feeling too bad... I think maybe the reason this stuff keeps coming back is because I just keep avoiding it... keep pushing it back in my mind so I don't have to deal with it...

What you said, Navy, seems like it might be true... Maybe I'm just making things worse...
Posted 4/27/2010 10:37 PM (GMT 0)
I really wish it would just go away on its own.... it would be a lot easier if it all just went away...
Posted 4/28/2010 6:13 AM (GMT 0)
Well... I'm going to try.... Tomorrow I have that appointment with a therapist that works here on campus... or well.... Today... er... Wednesday, I mean...

Thank you for your support...
Posted 4/28/2010 12:59 PM (GMT 0)
Celey,

With my sister in law she NEVER dealt with the issue. Didn't want to see a therapist, just tried to deal with it alone. Finally, doctors convinced her to get the help she needed. Her anxiety got so out of control that she would forget she already took her Ativan, and almost od'd on it. But she is doing great these days. The new med she is on has really helped and she is laughing and enjoying life again. Good luck with your appt.

Hugs
Gail*Nanners*
Posted 4/29/2010 4:03 AM (GMT 0)
I did go to the therapist today... but I dunno if I really accomplished anything.... I was too tired to really string together any coherent sentences... and... my therapist and I kinda had to deal with more pressing issues...

By which, I mean... figuring out how I'm gonna get my medicine (which I'm running low on), figuring out how to get food (which I'm running low on)...

Oh... and I managed to make a doctor's appointment to take care of what is most likely a urinary tract infection....

I have another appointment with her next week... so... we'll see how that goes...
Posted 4/29/2010 10:24 PM (GMT 0)
I'd like to feel better in the short-run, too, though... I messed up an experiment today in class... and man... you would've thought I had just put an end to all life on Earth or something... I had to rush out of class, so I could cry in the relative safety of a bathroom stall... I managed to stop crying enough so that I could go back and finish the report form (I'll no doubt miss a few questions)... But still... I had cried so hard... And it wasn't anything really major, and I still feel like I could bawl my eyes out at any moment just remembering it...

It seems like just anything will set off the waterworks... I mean... More than usual.... Because even when I'm feeling all right, I'll cry at the drop of a hat... but right now... it's even more ridiculous... I have a hard enough time dealing with crying so easily when I'm not in a depressed state... It seems impossible right now....

Think I'm gonna take a nap because I really wore myself out today...

My next appointment with the on-campus therapist is May 7th...

I mean... I don't really think I'm doing really, really bad... But I'm getting there... and I'm hoping I can get back on even ground... It seemed like I was doing fine... What? A month or so ago? I really hate it when I get like this...
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