HealingWell
Search Close Search
☰

New here.. Please help

Support Forums
>
Anxiety & Panic Disorders
✚ New Topic ✚ Reply
❬ ❬ Previous Thread |Next Thread ❭ ❭
Posted 9/21/2010 5:32 AM (GMT 0)

I have struggled with anxiety since I was a child, but only recently figured that out.

Now I have my own children, and I've noticed they are being effected by what Im going through.

Aside from making sure they are fed and bathed..Ive noticed that I haven't done much real bonding time with them.

I feel so guilty about this and feel like a terrible mother right now...  I love them so much.

But I have been going back and forth between anxiety and depression.  If I didn't have responsibilities I would sleep all day.

Every day I'm exhausted and distracted by what is going on within me.  My husband works overnights and sleeps during the day. 

So I feel very alone.  I have noone to talk to... and when I get this way I seem to shut down.  I ignore phone calls from family because I

don't have anything to say..and I don't want them to be down knowing that Im not doing so well.  I know I need to get myself together..but

its so hard to do..when I have so much to take care of outside of myself.  So sad right now and so ashamed of the mother and wife I have been.

My family shouldnt have to suffer right along with me.

Posted 9/21/2010 2:38 PM (GMT 0)
Hi and welcome! you have come to the right place. Repeat after me " I am a wonderful mother who is reaching out for the betterment of my family. I have nothing to be ashamed of-in fact I feel proud and empowered!!!" You have taken a first step in recovery from anxiety and depression-you have recognized that it is affecting you and your loved ones and you want to get help. I recommend starting with your regular doctor and asking for a therapy referral. In the meantime, check out some books from the library for treatment of anxiety. In combination with therapy, I learned so much this way. Also there are pages of archive posts that you may find comforting and informational here. You are surrounded by people on this board who care and understand what you are going through, so stick around! Anxiety and or depression are nothing to be ashamed about, but neither should they be ignored. Great job on taking this first step. Remember you are an awesome woman, wife and mother who deserves to feel well again;)
Best wishes, and let us know how you are doing soon,
Scaredy Cat
Posted 9/21/2010 6:13 PM (GMT 0)
Figure out what is bothering you the most and write down things, simple things, you can do to make it better.  Bonding with children is so easy when there is Love.  Find something you can all do together, even something simple if money is an issue, will make them happy and make you feel better.  Have a coloring contest, collect Fall Leaves, take some old fabric and make a doll or a pillow, you get the idea.  If you can accomplish one thing that eases your stress, which is the cause of all anxiety and depression, you will be that much closer to getting a real handle on it.

Remember anything good that is worth having, is never easy.  So get up and do the work, even if you don't feel like it and pretty soon the exhaustion will fade because you have directed your thoughts in a more positive manner.

Gem

Posted 9/21/2010 7:13 PM (GMT 0)
I'm also suffering very badly through anxiety and depression at the moment. Just felt like saying how much taht advice that Precious Gem just gave really inspired me.
" So get up and do the work, even if you don't feel like it and pretty soon the exhaustion will fade because you have directed your thoughts in a more positive manner."

Because darn, at times I really don't want to do anything. Ijust lay here like a lazy sack of crap all day and do the same thing Lilbit talked about. Ignoring family members calls, invites to hang out with friends, avoiding anything socially. But when I actually do something, like when I acutally finish some HW i had for school for example, I get that feeling of accomplishment. And yea it might be brief, but darn does it feel better then lying here all day.
Posted 9/21/2010 7:45 PM (GMT 0)
Mike, Let me tell you a story about a guy who was so depressed and thought things would never get better:  He decided one day that he was going to go jogging, on a 100 degree day, in a heavy sweat suit.  Being that he smoked and was 40 lbs overweight, well, you know what his thoughts were.  He went out and ran, came back home dripping in sweat, chest hurting, feeling like he was going to die but he did not.  Next day same thing.  This went on for two weeks, except that by the end of the two week period, he had lost 20 lbs., quit smoking and actually looked forward to his daily run, which kept getting longer and longer.  The depression left as well.  Misery loves company, just don't give it any.  For just one day pretend that you are not depressed or anxious, when you get those feeling, divert your attention immediately.  Lots of work?  Yes.  Great rewards?  You betcha'.

You can bet this, I did, you can.  I have all the faith in the world in you, but most importantly, you must have faith in yourself.  Forget all preconceived ideas and most important, forget what everyone else thinks or says of you, live your life your way and make your heart happy.

Best of Luck!

✚ New Topic ✚ Reply