All,
I saw my GP and also went to a support group yesterday. I'm feeling mixed up and topsy-turvy about what to do next to get some health/allergy answers.
My GP was pleased that I asked him for anti-anxiety meds, as that's all he thinks is going on. I'm not crazy about having asked: I stepped down from 20 years of Paxil this past spring, not liking the idea that tinkering with serotonin levels in my brain may have an effect on how they behave in my immune system. (There's no need to fear in general, for those of you who take SSRIs: a study in 2006 by Johns Hopkins found that serotonin is used by certain immune cells to communicate. The study merely concluded that more research be done to find out whether the effect of SSRIs was good or bad for the immune system.) After learning about the serotonin/immune relationship, and given my weird, newly-developing allergies, I decided to go off Paxil. This summer I had far fewer problems from my scary breathing allergies than in past summers. I had made some other changes, too, so maybe it wasn't the Paxil, but still, I hate to undo the enormous effort it took to stop taking it.
He also told me to try MY OWN ALLERGY TEST: scratch my arm, then rub the food I fear on it and see whether I get a welt. Given that I had a scary reaction to injection tests, I'm terrified to do that on my own. My current allergist WON'T give me a skin test, though, because of the reaction concerns. What I really want and need is an allergist who WILL DO IT, in the safety of his office, with help nearby. I've cut out so many foods for fear of "is it a reaction? Or not?" that my health is suffering on that front too. I've lost 40 pounds in 4 months, and that's too fast. (I used to weigh 220, so no fears of being underweight -- yet.) I do know of another allergist who insisted that I get such a test from him, and am considering contacting him about it. And I've started reacting to some metals, but can't tell which ones for sure, so that's scary (I have metal tooth fillings) and I don't know how to go about getting tested for those, given all the reluctance about the food tests.
I'm also scheduled to see a special allergy clinic in another state next month. Yet at my support group (first time going) last night, one parent of a patient said that the only kind of test they did there is the injection one - precisely the kind I had the BAD reactions from. I cannot face that kind of test again unless it's absolutely necessary, and even then only if they have ER drugs in addition to my Epi-Pen on hand IN THE OFFICE. So I have to call them and try to get straight what they do, compared with what I need, and make sure they take it seriously. So that almost makes the do-it-myself test seem the best option: at least I could control where (ER waiting room) and how I did that (ASAP, and not wait a month only to find out...nothing) and not face some nasty surprise.
Sorry for all the emphatic caps. I'm just so confused about how to get help for my physical issues, and relief from this debilitating anxiety about how they interfere with my breathing. I've also put into motion a process at work that will give me the next 4 months off on leave with pay (thank the Lord I'm in a position to do that). That's stressful, though, because it involves approval from upper management, and a letter from the GP, who doesn't really have much positive to say about what I've been doing in trying to get a diagnosis. So I'm worried about what the management -- and my coworkers - will think and say about that. Finally, we're moving offices soon, and the ventilation in the new building isn't closed in: several office share a vent and intake, and that means odors and particles from other offices can get into mine. Sometimes just weird smells make me struggle to breathe, so I'm scared about having no control over them at my workplace.
*sigh* Just venting a little. Thanks for being here.
percycat