The Dentist

I have anxiety/panic disorder, of course, but only two true fears, and one of them is going to the dentist. This is something I've dealt with for all of my life, well before anxiety and panic were ever an issue. When I was a little kid I made that girl from the Exorcist look like a normal person on days I went to the dentist.

I'm now 34 years old. Time really flies. It's been a very, very long time since I've been to a dentist. I'm talking probably fifteen years...a VERY long time. And it has been without incident, as I take care of my teeth the best I possibly can with mouthwashes and expensive toothpastes and whiteners and whatever else you can think of. But I guess it hasn't been enough. Something is going on.

I'm not sure what. I haven't had a toothache in so long I don't know what one feels like. I look my symptoms up, and cavities don't really fit. Could be gum disease. Could be TMJ. May be just an infection of the maxillary sinus, but that can apparently be caused by a dental problem.

Went to bed very late last night in considerable pain. It wasn't quite excruciating, but it was pretty uncomfortable. It would be relieved if I ate a saltine cracker and I though that was strange. Earlier on in the evening, stretching my jaw out relieved it, but that stopped helping when things got bad. I don't know what's causing it but last night I made up my mind to go back to the dentist after all this time.

The plan was to wake up, find someone around here who does sedation dentistry, and get it done at any cost. But when I woke up the pain was gone, and several hours later I'm wondering if I should go at all. Was it just my sinuses? I do have bad sinuses...was born with that problem.

I know the answer. Logically, I need to go to a dentist. It's been too long, and it's possible that some of my sinus issues could be cleared up with a healthier mouth. So now I'm leaning toward going, but it's so late now that I can't really go today, and of course it's Friday so the weekend is out of the question. This whole thing terrifies me. After all this time what are they going to find in there? How many trips will I have to make, and what kind of debt is it going to put me in? I don't want someone fooling around with my mouth...that fear has not gone away. I'm willing to do it with sedation but I am still scared as hell.

The dentist I've picked out is one of the more highly rated ones in the area who is close to me. They are closed on Fridays, though, and when I call the number I get a recording with an emergency phone number. It's not an emergency. Should I pick another dentist? This one had only one bad review out of 60. The others close by have considerably more than that with fewer reviews. And every other dentist around here has at least one review saying "they messed up my teeth so badly that my current dentist can't even believe it" or something to that effect. So I want to go to this dentist with good reviews. Then again, I want to make an appointment today so I'm locked in. I think if I don't have any firm plans over the weekend my anxiety riddled brain will come up with a bunch of reasons to justify not going, and I really do need to go. Way past due.

I just don't know what to do. Part of my brain knows what's up and realizes it's time to get it done. Another, louder, part of my brain doesn't want to go under any circumstances and is running all kinds of interference. My teeth aren't hurting now but my head is, so I think I'm just going to pray that advil will be enough if things go wacky this weekend and wait until Monday to do something.

Venting, I guess, but if any of you have any advice for me I'd appreciate it. I can't be the only one who fears the dentist. Most people have the common sense to go in spite of their fears...how do you do it?

Thanks, SC.

I'm not really a baby steps kind of person. If I move slowly my brain will jump in and think of 100 seemingly valid reasons not to go. I have to jump in head first into the cold, arctic waters of modern dentistry. What I haven't said is that I've been having pain for about a year, off and on. It's simply gotten a lot worse (more intense, more frequent) over the last couple weeks and just now have I started to even consider going.

I wrote my last post over the course of two hours. As I wrote I was following up on the homework I did last night. Cost isn't really a concern. I have good credit and am blessed with family who is willing to help. Business is tough...I only have about $1500 to my name in cash so I'm pretty sure this will wipe that money out. Not worried about that, though. I actually do have a dental insurance policy, but you know how those are...they don't pay for a lot.

The few people I've mentioned my tooth/jaw/whatever pain to over the last year or so have said that dentistry has improved by light years since I've last been, so that is encouraging. Reading over the dentist's site, it seems they even do cavities and minor gum stuff with lasers. Even the dreaded root canal is supposedly a lot easier. It could be that I've been making something out of nothing, but I'm still scared to the point that I'm not even working today. My nerves are fried.

The only reason I'm not having one of those "breakdown" days is because the dentist office is closed. Even if I wanted to I couldn't make a step today. In some ways that makes things harder, but it other ways it's a big relief. I did leave them a message to call me for an appointment when they re-open on Monday. Hopefully the pain won't be too bad over the weekend. I don't feel much of anything right now and what I do feel could be one of those anxiety mirages. I do worry that if I have no problems this weekend I won't take any steps toward doing what I need to do. Again, that brain of mine tries to weasel out of stuff like this.

I'm exhausted. Thanks for your encouragement.

EDIT -- it probably hasn't helped that it's nearly 1pm local time and I have just remembered to take my anxiety med. I'm going to play a video game or something.

Post Edited (debaser) : 12/10/2010 11:47:27 AM (GMT-7)

Hey Debaser,

I am with you, however, I have learned whenever I am to have any work done on my teeth I tell them when I make the appointment I want the "gas".  The typical response is "with the novacaine ????"  Oh yes,  I want everything and will pay for it out of pocket if necessary.  The bubblegum gas is really cool and I would knock a little kid to the floor if I had to in order to get the gas !!

My dentist will ask if I want the 2 martini or the 3 martini dose - I start with the 2 martini.

When I was in grade school my mother would never  let me get novacaine as well as she sent me to the dentist alone.  I have never got over the pain of that old fashon drill so now that I am an adult I do it my way. 

I understand your anxiety well.

Gentle Hugs,

Kitt

The dentist is scary for me. I had a bad experience as a child when I had a cavity filled and the dentist cut my lip open with the drill..

Typically I go in telling them I'm extremely scared and they take it nice and slow and I take deep breaths. Honestly if you find a great dentist you should experience little to no pain.  And like the others have said.. there's laughing gas and sedation too.  They offered me laughing gas the last time I was at the dentist, but I opted out.

I went and got my 4 wisdom teeth out last december and I was petrified, but I did it. Extremely painful but I had to... my wisdom teeth were decayed and I wanted to get invisalign to straighten out my teeth.

I'm actually due to go in for another filling and I'm honestly very nervous, but you will be just fine.

Just make the appointment and when you get there, let the dentist know you have anxiety about the whole situation. They should be very understanding. If they're not, walk right out!

Best of luck debaser! :)

TG~

Oh I wanted to mention that I actually did tell the dentist I was freaking out when I got a filling redone in august... they were very nice about it...

Take some deep breaths and know that they are only trying to help! We need our permanent teeth! No dentures! hehe

TG~

Hi. I'm new to this forum. I'm a dental phob with a history of anxiety and panic attacks. It's a loss of control thing with me as well as a feeling of being trapped. I very recently had a series of dental appointments and I wrote about how I got through them in my blog and also how during one of those appointments I lost it and jumped out of the chair. I'm not sure if I'm allowed to post my blog link here or not. I've got nothing to sell. I created it because I'm tired of the stigma that the world dishes out to people who have emotional and mental health challenges and blogging just one of many things I do to help myself and to hopefully inspire others with the progress I"ve made. Debaser, I know how dfficult it is and I wish you the best and hope you find your way to and through dental your appointment.

Have you had your wisdom teeth removed? Wisdom teeth can cause sinus issues.

Sort of a New Year's resolution? I'll make it mine too...better stock up on the Proseco first;)
S.C.