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bankprint, new member, I am not the same person I used to be !

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Anxiety & Panic Disorders
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Posted 3/25/2011 1:43 PM (GMT 0)
Posted Today 3:21 AM (GMT -6) by bankprint

 

what do you do who all the doctors throw pills at you . well after a while i just stop taking them and i start to fell better then little by little you notice things like you cant get up in the morings and you dont go to work. things just dont seem to matter anymore iam not this person i used to have friends now i have very little and the friends that i do have left a different towards me like iam not the same person why is that iam still a really nice person with alot to offer or hey maybe iam not i dont know. i fine i dont want to go anywhere now apart from work and home everything else scars me crapless there has to be a better way to make it through each day isnt there

Posted 3/25/2011 1:58 PM (GMT 0)
Good Morning bankprint and welcome to HealingWell. Your post really touched home as I have been struggling for the past 5 years trying to figure out where the old me went. I want her back so much but I realize life moves forwards not backwards so I have to work hard and keeping the anxiety and depression at bay.

I was dx 29 years ago and did very good for years with minor glitches until 5 years ago when it all fell down and I have been working hard at staying afloat on bad days.

When I am really down I don't want to leave home however my hubby will take me on short drives, down to watch the river. Just sit in the car and watch the river roll by.

All life is change. You cannot hope to go backward, not ever, not from anything, good or bad. All you can do is put it into its proper perspective and go forward. Pining for what was is not productive. Accepting what is and moving ahead with your life is the better plan. Tell yourself "One day I will come to terms with this. That day can be today."
Posted 3/25/2011 4:40 PM (GMT 0)
Hi Bankprint and welcome! You are right in saying that you are a good person with a lot to offer! Sometimes it just doesn't feel that way when we are weighed down with anxiety and/or depression!

You mentioned not wanting to be on meds anymore...what alternatives have you sought? Have you been in or considered therapy? Even if you have been before, maybe it's time for a refresher course? I went through a couple of rounds before it really began to work for me.

I am glad that you found us here. I think that if you stick around, you will find many members here with the same issues, who will be able to share great information, and give caring support:)

Take care and post anytime!
Scaredy Cat
Posted 3/25/2011 4:48 PM (GMT 0)
Husbands can be wonderful. I know when I was freaking out about going anywhere and I know I couldn't continue to live like that, my husband would just take me for rides. We would go just around a 10 mile radius and when we got home I would feel better. What helped me is I wasn't going anywhere to see anyone to have to do anyting.
Posted 3/25/2011 7:24 PM (GMT 0)
Hello Bankprint! Ive had anx/panic/dep ovr 10 yrs. Tried it alone, counselors, sev meds. Alone is bad. Gotta find right meds, trial n error/right counselor. Know @ times money an issue & have 2 check around. Its a priority as anx/p/dep effects ur whole life. U wld 4 cancer or broken leg. Understand crying jags/dreading/ miserable thoughts/not wanting 2 leave house. Still have trouble w/ that. Mods so right about short trips not 2 see anyone/ HAVE 2 do anything. Last yr of work had days I hid @ home. Shame ovr that. "how did I get here? NOT me. Wake up n find it was a dream. Have me & my life back". Have many physical ailments, mother passed, cant work. Life nothing like it was or ME. Working on accepting some changes. Life changes & we have 2 reevaluate n change w/ it. Some ppl will go cuz they dont know what 2 do, 2 help but dont know how. So we are here. Most need combo of meds/counseling/lots of support. Youll find help & understanding here. WELCOME!
Posted 10/15/2011 7:51 AM (GMT 0)
thankyou everyone for your caring words and support but i fear it is to late for me i can see no way out but one
Posted 10/15/2011 11:53 AM (GMT 0)
Hello Bankprint

I like what I read in your other post....that you go by your local coffee shop and read the paper to try to act normal. That in itself is a really great baby step toward wellness.

 

I would wish for you that there is local anxiety support group. I think that would be great for you to meet people that struggle like you and it may give you an opportunity to make some friends that would understand. Do a search in your area online and see if there is any support groups.

 

Posting here is a great step, tells me you are searching for hope and I hope that you find it. I have struggled for many years with anxiety and panic, it took a lot of effort, but now I am doing very well, med free. I am not the person I used to be...now I feel I am much stronger and wiser and I like me.

 

Keep the hope and believe that you can overcome some of this to live a better life.....best wishes for you.......WM

Posted 10/15/2011 12:34 PM (GMT 0)
Hi Bankprint.

Welcome to HW I am glad you have found this support group you will meet other who can relate to what you are going through and you have all ready had some great support from the members here.

Anxiety/depression is a hard thing to live with and I can relate on that one I often wish I would just wake up and all my problems are gone. I also have friends who just can't relate to what I am going through and find it difficult to speak with me but I can understand that.

I have just done some group therapy and I can recommend that I found it really helpful and have kept in contact with people after the course had finished. Keep coming here we are here to listen and offer support were we can and you can get through this hard time. Try and keep yourself active even if it is something small it will help keep your mind of things.
Set yourself some goals and cross them of when you achieve them and keep them as a reference to look back on. Keep us posted we are here to help.

Hibee
Posted 10/15/2011 1:58 PM (GMT 0)
BP, before you make any decisions please stop and think about your children. If I am reading your post correctly...and I hope I am mistaken...then I would be negligent in not providing this information:

1-800-SUICIDE -or- 1-800-784-2433
suidide/depression hotline

800-999-9999
Covenant House

Nineline/Teen Support http://nineline.org

Again, I hope I am wrong, but your post has me concerned. Please call someone if you are having feelings of despair/self-harm.

I have been in some dark places, and there is recovery, believe that.

Please post again and let us know how you are doing soon.

Scaredy Cat
Posted 2/6/2012 2:08 AM (GMT 0)
Hi, its me. Im still here. Had to give it all up TEMPORARILY LG TERM n staying w sister n UP of MI. Had alot of probs. Abdominal performation, acc. by doc. Thats better. Had 5 brain bleeds still have probs frm that. Still taking my anx-dep meds. Lost cobra ins. Waiting on Medicare n ssdi. Have become almost agorophobic. Fractures healing. Times I wanna give up 2 but seen 2 many miracles. They r there. Do literally 1 day @ a time. I miss my sons so much makes me sick. But the day will come when its better. I know this. The rite meds, hope, drs, I DO believe God will make it so. HUGGZ
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