Hi! I'm new here and felt you guys wouldn't mind if I shared my woes!
History in a nutshell, really REALLY worry about stomach bugs, curiously not with me in mind but my other half and child. I worry so much I panic a bit if I read about someone having one on Facebook! This crazy state of affairs started (I believe) when my son was less than a year old and it seemed he and my OH were constantly suffering from these bugs, she even lost a job because she was ill, which then sent me spiraling into thinking distasterous thoughts! "We'll lose our home, I'll lose my job, we'll be destitute!" I did all sorts of crazy things lke checking my sons nappies every couple of minutes to see if he was ill (this was constant) asking my OH how her bowel movements were, text/emailing her to see how they had been during work, I would get the sweats, shakes etc at a certain point of my journey home from work incase I got home to......POO! Seriously, I was a madman obsessed!
So OH and Mum staged an intervention of sorts and sent me to the doc, after helping me write a list (A4 size) of what was on my mind and the little obsessive things I did. The doc listened, watched me break down into a quivering mess and eventualy said "ok, we can hit this with some meds or counselling" I asked what she thought was best because I could barely speak. She put me onto 50mg Sertraline and said I was to return in 2 weeks. I dutifully took my pills, felt sick as a dog for about a week, then they bedded in and had no noticable effect! So, back to he doc, who asked how I was and had stopped checking nappies, I had! Succes I thought! Turns out tho that I was now constantly taking his temperature, doc told me off in no uncertain terms and doubled my dose.
I am now aware that my nutshell is becoming a nut box! But hey, in for a penny........
Stayed on that dose for a year(ish) dropped to 50 again, tried counselling and really struggled with it. I struggled with getting away from work-they were fine about it, I just struggled removing myself, I hated the fact that to deal with problems the counsellor wanted to bring them up so I was worrying even when I felt pretty good if that makes sense. My cousellng relationship lasted about 5 sessions before she told me that I would have to discontinue due to my lack of commitment.
Time passed, still worried a bit but I guess the pills took the edge off. My OH and I parted company for a year or so but are now back together and expecting. I actually weaned myself almost off my meds whilst apart and stopped them New Years day.
Now today, OH tells me that she maybe feels ill and I go into complete meltdown! Sweats, shake, angry outbursts, the works! Not even sure if she is ill or if its just a pregnancy thing! Chaos!
Now that I have typed my epic I can't remember why I started it! But I put the effort in so if you want to read it and even pass comments then thats cool!