Trust

melodee This is a topic I could talk about for a long time.  I was raised to believe in people, to trust them to love me and care about me and so I would jump into friendships or situations with my eyes wide open thinking I knew these were all good people as they told me they were. I cannot tell you how many times I was let down or abandoned by people who said they were my friends and that we would be friends forever.  My birth mother died when I was 22 months old and my Pdoc feels that set me up for life as it was my first experience at feeling abandoned.  I also felt that I also had to be a people pleaser if I wanted people to like me and be my friend.  The heartbreak this kind of thinking brings is nearly unbearable when people turn on you, desert you or tell you to your face, " I never liked you from the beginning"  Ouch ! I could give you example after example of how I promised myself I would never put myself in this situation again but of course I never kept that promise to myself.  I am a people person, I want to believe that there are good people who care about me but you have a great point, only you can love yourelf the best, nuture yourself and be proud of who you are. When we have a mental health disorder it makes it much more difficult to get past our hurts and feelings and we seem to hold on to old hurts.  Practice honesty and integrity. Be true to yourself. With each interaction, practice peeling off the mask we've all been taught to wear and focus on being your authentic, unique and wonderful self.  I try not to agonize over every little thing that is said.  I try not to care that much anymore about what other people thing, but in a good way.    If a relationship cannot be healed, it should end as gracefully as possible and do no harm—even when I  feel I have  been wronged. Gentle hugs to you, Kitt    

Thank you Kitt and SC. You both always have the best advice and answer for us!
I used to be a people person too and loved socializing and interacting with others. Lately, I have become more picky and cautious.

I've been told I need to take risks in both relationships and with work. And that thread on Davy Jones....that ghosst8 started..... I strongly believe that we all do need to take risks if we want to live life to the fullest.

"He who is not courageous enough to take risks will accomplish nothing in life." - Muhammad Ali
"Our lives improve only when we take chances -- and the first and most difficult risk we can take is to be honest with ourselves." -Walter Anderson