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Feeling like i am cracking up

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Posted 3/5/2012 6:08 PM (GMT 0)
Hi, my screen name is Display.

Having a lot of weird feelings today, including the feeling that I am cracking up. Very anxious.

I took 1/2 of a clonopin, perhaps that will help, although it makes me sleepy, I may need a nap this afternoon.

One of the things I am anxious about is the possibility that one of my staffing agencies will call with a work assignment.

I have a lot going on in my life: a move coming up, and I am currently housesitting for my sister. This means also taking care of her dogs, which I realized makes me anxious.

On the other hand, I don't seem to have enough activities in my life to keep me occupied. Lots of time to sit around the house.

Have been smoking like a fiend, and having trouble finding things to eat. Mostly just eating because I know I need to.

I have an appointment with my psychiatrist on Friday, so that is good.

Anyway, that is me today. Hopefully someone will respond with some encouraging words/thoughts.

Thanks for listening,
Posted 3/5/2012 6:26 PM (GMT 0)
sorry - a few more things to say.

i know i am in an in-between time in my life - between jobs and between places to live. sometimes it's hard to believe that things will work out. i just wish things would settle down for me a bit.

when i get really depressed, i question my will to go on living. i don't have suicidal thoughts but i do feel that life is hard, and wonder if i will be able to handle what comes my way.

thanks for listening,
Posted 3/5/2012 8:12 PM (GMT 0)
How would going for a walk with the dogs go for you???? That way you're getting some fresh air...and you won't be able to smoke with 2 dog leases in hand...lol. Do you like to read?? If so I have a couple recommendations.
Posted 3/5/2012 8:46 PM (GMT 0)
Hi display:)

I am sorry that you are having a rough day. At least you ave recognized your triggers though...that is a good step!

Uncertainty about the future, especially in major things like your job and living arrangement is pretty understandable. Everyone has some level of worry regarding these things...and with good reason. Stress motivates us to do the things that we need to do. Managing a healthy level of anxiety however is not easy for us to do!

Member jobell's suggestion of getting out for a walk, or distracting yourself with some reading, or other activity is a good idea.

You can also set boundaries for yourself. Give yourself a certain amount of time a day for 'constructive worry' about the things that you need to address for the future. Then after this set amount of time, if your mind tries to go back into worry mode...distract, distract, distract!

I hope that you can start to feel more comfortable with the things that will come your way. You are capable of handling it! I have faith in you, now you can start to work on finding it in yourself.:)

S.C.
Posted 3/6/2012 3:10 PM (GMT 0)
Thanks for the feedback.  I am doing better today.  I took care of some tasks yesterday and now I feel like my week is planned and I am taking care of things that need taking care of.

And thanks for reminding me of using distraction when I am anxious or depressed.  I get in a rut where I do the same things and get bored.  I need to find some other things to do.

Also, thanks to this website I have gotten better at voicing my thoughts and feelings, and am reaching out to friends from my 12-step program, just to say how I am doing, and to get suggestions on how to use my recovery to handle depression and anxiety.

Thanks for listening,

Posted 3/6/2012 3:39 PM (GMT 0)
display,

I am glad to read you are having a better day.  Please know you are not alone and yesterday was a really bad day for me too.  I ended up at my Drs. office and another switch in meds again.  I am working hard at dealing with a lot of anxiety and depression lately and wish I had a magic cure for all of us.

Life is full of challenges. Sometimes situations are beyond our control, and sometimes we create challenges by our own hands. It isn't always easy to face them alone. Sometimes we just need somebody to understand us.  Sometimes we just need a friend. coming here and talking with us is a good thing to do as we know where your coming from and what you are going through.

Kindly,

Kitt

 

Posted 3/6/2012 3:48 PM (GMT 0)
that is a really interesting thing you said about "we are not alone".  when i am depressed or anxious, i usually feel that i AM all alone, as the world spins around and everyone else goes on their merry way.

it really is important to remember that others are suffering.  that is probably why i keep coming back here, to hear about other people's struggle with anxiety and depression.

thanks for your reply,

Posted 3/6/2012 4:39 PM (GMT 0)
display

You are right on.  Yesterday when I felt so bad,  going out in public made me feel even more alone as I watched others go about their lives, smiling and working and they reminded me of how I used to be one of them.  I sat in the waiting room and as the tears fell I just wanted to disappear as I wanted so much to feel happy. 

Coming here helps me to remember that there are so many others that feel what I do and not only do they feel it, they understand how isolated a mental health disorder can make you feel so dang sad.

So coming here and sharing with each other helps us to remember we are never alone no matter how lonely life feels.

Kindly,

Kitt

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