Teenage son's anger causing extreme anxiety - can anyone relate?

I first came across this at my children's high school. Out of 60 students five were cutting themselves. My son figured this out. Needless to say he felt overwhelmed and helpless. As parents, we were clueless. None of us had ever heard of such a thing.
Your son needs immediate medical help and cognitive behavior therapy as fast as possible. One of the students was my youngest son's girl friend. It is now 8 years later. She is doing well in college and most importantly she is happy! Do not blame yourself for this but insist on getting him help. Many hugs.

Has he refused? If he has, then please speak to his doctor. The fact that he is harming himself gives the medical community more rights to intervene. You are in a terribly frightening and painful situation. Outside help can provide tremendous support. Is he still in school? Our school brought in specialists trained with many years of experience specifically in the treatment of teenage cutters. Persuading them they need help is usually the first and most important step. Many of them seemed like they just needed someone to tell them that there was hope and they could have a better life. Do not be alarmed if he is unable to accept this message from you. I do not know why but the kids always seemed to listen better to shrinks even when the shrinks were saying exactly what the parents had said.
I wish I had more personal experience to share.

Hello Hazelnut, my heart goes out to you. You letter moved me because I went through 5 years of drugs, smoking, drinking. He just changed over night. From 13 to 18 he drove me to a breakdown. He would do nothing to help himself. Bryan had teenage acne and he would pick them until he had infections constantly. He had a girl friend for 3 years and he did seem to dearly love her. I think she just could not stand his actions either. When they broke up he called me threatening suicide. He just wanted me to know that he loved me and the things he did was not my fault. I hung up and called the police to meet me at my house. He was high on something and just out of control. I had him arrested and our primary care doctor called a judge and we had him committed to an excellent mental hospital for 3 weeks. He hated me of course but I had no choice. I had to save his life. He is 36 now and is a totally different than that teenager. Owns his own home, good job and just an all round super guy, willing to help anyone. I am so proud of him and we have a great relationship.

well from talking with numerous counselors today, there is nothing i can do unless he has severely hurt himself or threatens to. he has had a few black eyes lately and he isn't cutting, but i guess hitting himself. it's so heartbreaking to hear. he told his stepmother but never wants me to know anything. he has to know she tells me stuff though. he got mad when i confronted him yesterday when he was being hateful. he lied to me when he was at my house and told me he had an accident at work. she also said he has taken his keys and hurt his arm with them.

if he isn't willing to get counseling on his own, there is nothing i can do if he is a "legal" adult. so i just sit back and wait for him to come to me. the more i hound him, the madder he gets. it's so hard. from doing research online, teenage self harm is more common than i thought. he has talked to my bf and his friend i found out (i'm friends with his mom) and he seems fine they said. not sure if he just doesn't feel comfortable opening up to them or what is going on. i wish he would break up with his gf. she told me once that he hit himself when she tried to break up with him. but they are both insecure and don't trust each other. it's not just him. when he comes to visit me, she calls him nonstop. so unhealthy. i told her to not him manipulate her. but now she won't speak to me because it makes him mad. i understand and have no contact with her parents at all. she is 17.

it's so hard.