Feeling Terrible

These past few weeks have kicked me in the butt. Everything that has been bothering me is coming to a complete full throttle. My whole body is aching and I move and all I hear is cracking, I feel like I am 19 going on 90 LOL!

It hurts to breathe in like my lungs are tight, and I feel like I have a cough. My throat feels like I have been running in the cold, my mom has a chest cold but I feel like I am... dying as usual. I can't seem to feel better at all. I feel lonely and kind of at a point in my life of not knowing which way to go, stress, stress.

And my lymphoma obsessed mind is making me nuts! I have a doc's appt. in april but jeez. I have a really itchy ankle and I searched it, and firsy thing, lymphoma. I don't know how to stop feeling like this, I barely google anymore which is a good thing, even though I searched the itchiness LOL! But it sucks cause I have googled and now all that information that I read is stuck in my head. I push on my sides, my neck dissecting myself, and it makes me feel crazy. I feel like I literally have cancer. The scariest word in my vocabulary. My grandpa has just been diagnosed with bladder cancer on valentines day, so you could imagine how that freaked me out.

I feel like my parents have just sluffed me out now with this stuff. My mom just seems to be annoyed, maybe that is freaking me out more. I will keep yous updated, thank you for always listening, hope everyone is well!

hi flashing lights,

I remember you from a while ago. I was also going through the same thing you are. I luckily got passed it and I'm fine now. your mind is the one making you think such things. indeed if you Google things and you see you have and read other symptoms you start feeling them and believe you have them.

as I recall you posted this about when I was going through the same thing. your anxiety is making you feel this , I would Google symptoms for lymphoma and I would only gave one or two but I read the rest and would suddenly start developing the rest. like itchy ness. I didn't gave that but I read about it then I was itchy all over.

I told my doctor, about what I thought I had and he laughed. he told me that a little but of information can drive a person nuts. and he was sure I didn't have . it. he said start away from the internet. it was hard to believe him but you just gave to trust your doctor.

well months later, (now) I am getting great. I don't Google symptoms. our think about it really. but it was a hard time for me as I also had surgery for some other thing non related to lymphoma . I had an abcses which started the whole lymphoma panic. I had cough and stuff for months until I received surgery it all went away. well also cuz I had piece of mind.

you'll get through this. good luck