Please Help My Horrid Reality.

Hello,

Can anybody help me? Lately I have been feeling extremely anxious and afraid, and I don't know why. I have had similar problems in the past but it has never been so intense. Everything I see and everything I hear fills me with a sudden dread, an un-explainable horror. I constantly feel like somebody is going to hurt me, and I'm growing increasingly paranoid. When I walk places I can sometimes hear footsteps moving behind me, causing me to walk faster. But the faster I walk, the faster I hear them. There is somebody very close to me, but I never will know who. Everytime I turn around to see them, they are normally gone. It's like I just happen to turn around just as they are turning down a different street, or going out of my sight. I see shadows on the ground and sometimes feel as if they are there for a reason other then the most obvious one. Maybe somebody is just playing tricks apon my mind. When people speak to me I only hear this deep and terrifying growl. The fear never leaves me. It's not like going to the movies and watching a scary flick. This is much different. This is a sudden, mind-numbing terror. I feel as if I can never 'take-it-easy' or relax, because these things always return. There can and will not be an escape to this. Maybe my problem is that I take something too seriously, which could spark my anxiety. I really don't know. Please help me.

Post Edited (cjinvalid) : 5/2/2013 2:06:30 AM (GMT-6)

Hi cjinvalid and welcome.

I am so sorry that you are feeling such an intense level of fear at the moment.

If your symptoms of anxiety have changed/worsened recently, then I too have to suggest that you be seen by your doctor/mental health specialist.

Have you had treatment for anxiety in the past? Medication or therapy?

It may be time to revist your treatment options to help you get through this rough time.

I wish you the best. Let us know how it goes after your appointment okay?

Scaredy Cat

Dear cjinvalid,

Did you talk to your doctor before stopping the meds? yes, you need another referral to a psychiatrist so that he can properly diagnose and treat your condition. These new round of symptoms may be a recurrence from your previous experience. One psychologist told me that my anxiety recurred and deteriorated because I did not seek proper treatment in the past...hope you seek prompt treatment. All the best! :)

I was increasing under his recommendations, but not decreasing or stopping. In fact, I started rescheduling my appointments just so I could avoid what I thought was his criticism. I remember they also tried getting me to go to group therapy, along with taking the medication and 1-on-1 sessions. They always told me that treatment only worked in 2 pieces, one piece being medicine and the other being speaking, or communicating with somebody (Them specifically). And that in order for the medicine to fully work that it should be coupled with counseling. I later started feeling like I was referred to that doctor for a reason, and was given those medicines for a reason. Like they knew that I would stop taking them, and that it would later cause me larger problems. I used to think that there was something in the pills that were slowing killing me, and that was supposed to be the final outcome. Maybe that is how I convinced myself they were in-effective. Larry, you said "That being said you seem like a very honest, strait talking person the sooner you get your medications straightened out the sooner you can be the person you want to be." I don't have an idea of who I want to be, I just know I don't want to be me. Sometimes I wish that there was some surgery that I could get that would remove a piece of my conscience and implant it into my doctors, so they knew exactly what the problem is. The reason I mention this is because I don't feel like I can trust them, or that they don't really understand. I realize that they are the ones with the degree's, but that doesn't mean they fully understand or have experienced the same things. Have you ever experienced anything similar? I feel like the more I talk about these things, the more of an idiot I am. Everyone has there own problems, and each emotion is specific to that person. Meaning my idea of happiness or sadness is different then everyone elses. That being said, sometimes I feel that suffering through it is better then risking somebody else hurting me. I'm afraid of everyone and everything. I scratch my mind searching for that moment where I let it come crashing down, but nothing appears.

...good point...and also sometimes when we are really stressed and having acute anxiety, we can tend to think and feel that things are threatening and even working against us, when this is not in fact the reality.

Please consider seeing another doctor that can help you to get back to feeling your best...you are worth it, and it could be the best gift that you can give yourself...even if you are apprehensive, take a leap of faith.

We are here to support you in whatever you decide to do.

S.C.

C.J.,

Are you planning on looking for another doctor? I hope that you are able to reach out and get some help this week.

I really think that you could benefit from a new opinion to help you get to the bottom of your issues, and get started in some treament to help you to feel better.:)

Keep us posted,

S.C.