Posted 8/10/2013 1:25 AM (GMT 0)
Iam truely down&low right now and I brought it on myself but I so have learned&will not be doing it anytime soon,may never be again because I don't understand how I can win 3,000 about a month and a half ago to never see that kind of luck again that was also about the time I was so angry with God ai wasn't even speaking his name,so you can say I was standing on the devil side then and wins came back to back behind each other. Money&everything but Iam back to the basic now goimg pay check to pay check and I hate it,but why do I play my money to lose half my check money I did need. Trying to win money to be broke in same day waiting on next check,stupid I must say and I should've known the feeln of loseing good enough to know better by now. I so do now&want return to a casino until because I need to get on my feet&get my life together,I sometime dig in dirt&get stuck why because Iam just that stupid. And now that the evil boss has cut me down to two days,that takes a week from my pay high school money truely not worth my time but I hang in there,until better come Iam going to get better I see now it want come fast enough waiting. And Iam not getn down on myself Iam just being real because all the stress of working that job,I might as well just have put the check in the trash because thats what I go and do when I take my hard earn money and put in them cheating machines. No more the stress is not good for my anxiety and then I feel bad &I just heard my spirit say how can I trust you with something big when you trash the small,but then I wonder how will I ever win anything if I don't play anything to win. I don't go to clubs are anything and I don't drink are nothing what am I to do for fun omg do I just have a bored life? Smh Iam in a I wonder zone,because I just don't know. So I will have to set something in place and get focus you eould think I lost a million dollars sad as Iam,I only lost 125.00 touch fir me when I have saw ppl lose 500.800.1000. 500.000.000 yup I said a half of million dollars,so I better stop at 125.00 don't need another problem I will need help for so as you can see day one started off good but hasn't been a well one uggghhhh I can just scream.