On My Walk

So I took a walk to walmart to pick up yet another med& my mind started to go in circles,and I started to look back on why this&that and where did this anxiety come from&what can I do to get rid of it for once and for all& Ive came to learn Iam not the only one that deals with this problem call fear&the cover up name is anxiety. For with truth thats all anxiety is(fear) fear of the unknown,fear of bugs,fear of dogs,fear of tall buildings,fear of flying. Whatever it is that one may fear is anxiety of faceing it&seeing it through,or scared to face it well my fear started 14 years ago&off and on through the years I have had some good years&then bad ones.
But through it all I did my best and do my best to see my way through but Iam at my breaking point now,Iam tired of being scared rather off and on are some years¬ others Iam just tired of being scared. And Ive started to ask God how do I shake what hunts many minds,mine being one&what do I do to overcome it&make peace with it. To the point it will no longer hunt me when Iam awake&at times when Iam asleep,how do I remove myself from this fear I so a friend post to her twitter page that death scares her&no matter who it is if she no them are not death scare her. For me it is not the death part it is the no longer being part my thoughts are is there true life in the later,I see many post about this I was watching criminal minds where there was a man that was taking life tp bring back to life to ask what did they see. Truth be told everybody has the thought and if your mind is like mine full with anxiety,your mind may go deep to the point there become so much fear you become scared to live.
So knowing that no matter how hard one try thats a promise that will never be broken,and it has made me angry and thats because when I take a look back I get so mad at the years lost. To be so torn&stressed out to feeling like there is no longer a way out,I feel like Iam losing the fight of my life&I wonder was this it for I haven't done all I desire to do. I will no longer watch news are open a sad story fact is I no longer want to know whats going on in the world because its so sad to me how some can be so heartless about life to take it,I no longer want to read abput it are see it I have to do whats best for me not selfish just being real because my heart pain to much&it is like I take on the hurt&pain for people I don't know and for me&my well being that is not good at all to care that much. It has started to make me feel so weak&I never desire to be,so I will start to rebuild myself to the fact of what will be will be&there is nothing I can do about it. And what I can change&have in my power to change. I will change praying that strength be unto me tio stand firm,rebuild and restore me to a fresh a new braver more fearless& even stronger to overcome. So 2014 will be my year of greater for it has no other choice but to be in every single way,I will live and I will win and see my greater&so will you for you&I have been through enough