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Posted 12/22/2013 4:32 AM (GMT 0)
Hello,

I'm having an anxiety attack right now about my mom. She has clinical depression and says some mean things to me some times. I'm on edge 24-7 and can't tell if she's actually mad at me or not. I cry a lot when I think she's mad at me. I need some advice please help.
Posted 12/22/2013 6:16 AM (GMT 0)
Kajitora your Mother is just frustrated with Her condition and not being able to make it go away, this is the
time you must Love more than anger can stand, be faithful in the face of all adversity, hold your tongue so
you never need to regret words that escape our lips in anger. Take your own self and feelings for example
there is no way you could hate your Mother, it's the same for Her, She Love's You and this make's it so
much more difficult for Her to accept Her condition. I don't know where You are but hopefully She can get
a doctors care, I don't know how old you are but know this one thing this will pass, don't let fear or anger
bring anymore hurt to your Family, I Pray for You Both, Peace.

Larry ***
Posted 12/22/2013 6:20 AM (GMT 0)
I'm in my 20s and still living at home but that won't be for very much longer. My wife lives with us too and a couple of months ago they had a major fight that has left me with what I think is post traumatic stress. Ever since their fight I have been so scared to death of making my mom angry. My wife says I'm blowing my mother's anger way out of proportion when she is clearly fine and not mad at all. I can't tell when my mom is mad/irritated/whatever. What do I do if she's mad/says something not so nice to me? Right now I just panic and hide in my closet and cry. What do I do?
Posted 12/22/2013 6:43 AM (GMT 0)
In as much as you have already decided to move you have already made a decision that will resolve this
problem, it's easier for an outsider to see the problem with just a little information, your Mother who Love's
you can see that She is loosing you to your wife. This is not unusual for a Mother or Father, giving up one's
children even to a Wife or Husband is still painful and will take a little time and healing. Also part of Her pain
is facing the future without You, just be a man and let Her see you are strong and will be ok. Peace

Larry ***
Posted 12/22/2013 6:57 AM (GMT 0)
I'm not a man, I'm a woman. So I'm not sure how to "be a man" as you say. Thank you for your advice, I really appreciate it.
Posted 12/22/2013 9:37 AM (GMT 0)
Sorry hope I did not offend you, I still think the moving out has put an additional stress on your Mother,
just give her some space and keep the Love open for her, I still wish you Peace.

Larry ***
Posted 12/22/2013 5:56 PM (GMT 0)
Hi Kaji and welcome,

I agree that having space for you and your partner is the best possible move that you could make at this time.

You can still be close and support your mom, without living under the same roof...perhaps even better.:)

You have joined yourself to your wife, and therfore, will want to take steps to strenghten that relationship.

This does not mean that your relationship with your mom diminishes...it will just change.

Keeping in close contact with her, while still striving to start your own life with your partner is a good goal.

If this is causing you undo stress...please see the self-help coping exercises in our Resources. Here are a few to get you started.

Self Help sites with breathing/relaxation exercises instructions

Panic attack relief exercises:

http://www.healthyplace.com/

http://www.stress-relief-exercises.com/

http://www.ehow.com/video_4405003_breathing-exercises-panic-attacks.html

http://www.psybersquare.com/anxiety/panic_relax_I

 

Best wishes and post with us any time for support.

Scaredy Cat

Posted 1/4/2014 2:39 AM (GMT 0)
Trying to move out is becoming unbearable since the process is going so slow. My panic attacks have increased and my anxiety is through the roof. I always think my mom is mad at me or my wife when she's not. My mom is constantly in bed with depression and I can't tell if she's mad or not. I don't know how to let go or stop crying, please help.
Posted 1/4/2014 3:57 AM (GMT 0)
Hi Kajitora,

I am sorry to hear of the continued tension in your household.

Here is a resource that I think may help you. It is a bit lengthy, and will require some time to read through...but it could help you to gain some insight into your relationship with your mom.

http://newstartclub.com/resources/detail/dysfunctional-relationships-how-to-survive-and-thrive

I would also encourage you to consider therapy as a way to help you to deal with the situation and feelings surrounding your complicated relationship with your mother.

Wishing you peace (and a quick move!)

S.C.

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