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Hello Friends - Add me In The Anxiety/Panic Attack Club!!!!

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Anxiety & Panic Disorders
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Posted 5/13/2014 10:58 PM (GMT 0)
Hello and thank you for reading this.

I have been lurking this forum since I felt chest pains and freaked out last year in July/August.

Long story short: I suppose it was anxiety. I’ve suffered all my life from anxiety and depression, but because I spent 20 years caring for my aged parents working part time, I never had insurance, so simply suffered on my own.

I was given low dose of xanax last year during that whole deal, and WOW!!! For the first time in my life, I felt “normal”! Years spend fighting the torment, I’m not kidding, and one pill, and I felt like everyone else! I am still in awe of it!!!!

Trouble is, Doctors seem really shy to prescribe it. I understand it’s a narcotic, very addictive (yes!!! Because it works!!!) but for me? It’s my nirvana. My saving grace.

My new (thanks to the ACA and full time business since my folks passed away) I now have insurance. My Doc gave me xanax (thankfully) but said “Take it 3 days on, 1 off so you do not get addicted”. It’s only 90 pills @ 0.75 mg 2x a day. That’s a low dose.

Uhhh… Plus…. As you know…. Anxiety does not take a day off, and …

….Seems like my luck: I got a mammogram as part of the new insurance, and *surprise* you need more tests (FREAK!!!!!)

I got more tests yesterday, freaking out, on the edge of sanity, and now hoping my Doc will renew my xanax a bit early (after 32 days BUT I did take as prescribed on the bottle). The anxiety over getting the xanax has been horrendous not to mention this NEW health anxiety!!!


Doc wasn’t there today, so I bite my nails another night. I don’t like her staff, they don’t care, and as for the mammogram test results, they told me the Doc would only call if something was wrong?

Are you joking? Leave me waiting????

So I asked if I could call and see if I was ok… And she said that was fine, but really????

Does this even sound right? I will switch and try another Doc after the test results come in so those are not lost in the mail, but any suggestions about the xanax in case she refuses me? I tried looking up mental health or psychiatrists on my insurance plan, and see nothing. It’s hell to call them, but should I start pursuing that just in case???

Is that the route to go? And not sure if anyone can advise me, sorry if I am not supposed to be asking this. Just know my anxiety is at peak rate right now and I am very scared for tests results AND the pills that normalize me.

I thank you all SO much for taking the time to read this, sorry so long, it felt good to share even if no one can advise me. Thank you kindly.


P.S. I have tried many of the links posted at the top of the forum last year. I really tried them, I wish they helped more, but I was so happy to see so many caring people here, and the moderators-- I too moderate another board so know about your hard work and you give wonderful support... xo
Posted 5/13/2014 11:05 PM (GMT 0)
I make sure to tell anyone who does my testing that I have anxiety. My cardiologist told me, if I don't hear from him, it was a good thing. Well I said, No you have to call me and tell me if things are okay. He said I usually call if they aren't. Well for me, I would be thinking how long will he know, how long will it be that he will or won't call. So he said okay I will call either way. Thankfully my ultrasound on my heart was fine. But I needed that call, or I would have been in a panic waiting to see if he was or wasn't going to call. I did the same thing for my mammogram, the lady said don't worry if you don't hear anything. I said to late, I am already worried just doing the test..lol So they called too. The one thing for us anxiety sufferers is that we need to hear the words, because we still don't believe it most of the time. Waiting on test results just increase our anxiety. That's the only suggestion I can say, is make them aware that you will worry more, if they don't tell you the results..Good luck to you and welcome aboard.
Posted 5/13/2014 11:14 PM (GMT 0)
Hi Paddicake77 and thanks for sharing. Wow so this IS standard stuff? How can anyone NOT be worried and NEED to hear "good news"??

Glad your results were all good!! I have my hopes up for my latest test. Ugh.
Posted 5/13/2014 11:22 PM (GMT 0)
Hello and welcome! I am really glad that you have decided to jump in here and join us...and that you are already familiar with the forum is a bonus.;)

Great advice from P.C. regarding asking for your your results as soon as they're available. Your doctor and his office work for you, and you have the right to ask for a call either way!

I am sure that your results will be fine...but I completely understand your worries.

As far as your Rx concern goes...I think that perhaps asking your doctor about taking the benzo on an as needed basis might be a good move.

The way the directions read now...3 days on, one off...has an obvious problem.

You may be taking your pill on an "on day"...perhaps when it isn't really needed...

...and then on your "off" day, you may find it totally necessary!

So holding out as best you can everyday...and only taking when you absolutely have to could find you actually needing less than you are using now.

Ask your doctor about this possibility...it is worth a try, and as long as you are careful/responsible in your dosing, this could be a good choice for you.

Keep posting with us anytime. We care, and support is key!

Scaredy Cat
Posted 5/13/2014 11:29 PM (GMT 0)
Hiya Scaredy Cat! I've read so many of your supportive posts, I feel like I know you already. Thank you for having such a warm heart and caring personality.

Yeah, the Doc told me to "take as needed", and I have but I admit, I'm trying to keep a few extra just in case of emergency...

I have been trying to "cure myself' from depression and anxiety since I was a teen, 35 years of reading all kinds of self help books, listening to radio psychologists, majoring in it at one point, etc ...

Am NOT a pill taker, but by this stage, I give up!!! At 51, I just want to feel normal! This is not a new thing for me. Ugh lol....

Thx again for your advice.
:)
Posted 5/14/2014 12:23 AM (GMT 0)
Is your doctor a psychiatrist or family doctor? Family docs are getting away from prescribing benzodiazepines, pain pills etc bc of new DEA laws.

My psychiatrists office is very liberal (albeit professionally) prescribing my Xanax. They don't bat an eye. They know I'm
Not a pill seeker and like you, I don't like to take meds either and Xanax is a lifesaver for me too. I take PRN. .25mg at least 1/day lately, sometimes 2.

Consider seeking out a Psychiatrist for your brain meds like Xanax :)

Best wishes!

Blessings,
Lisa
Posted 5/14/2014 12:28 AM (GMT 0)
Wow Lisa, thanks so much! OK I get it now.

Had a few Docs as I had to pay cash, then got on insurance, and they were all good about giving me one small prescription, but not refills of xanax.

(And I DID try, VERY hard, to use CBT, distractions, meditation, you name it to avoid taking xanax at first).

Hmmm I'll call my insurance company and ask how to go about this.

Thanks again. :)
Posted 5/14/2014 12:37 AM (GMT 0)
Oh and as for waiting/getting test results, I just call the doctors office myself if I don't get a call in a day or 2. Recently I had my B and D vitamins tested and they called me the next day! I was impressed lol. My gyno has an 800# to call to get your results. I love that!

My point- don't worry abt bothering them, call if you want. You paid for the tests so it's your right :D


Blessings,
Lisa
Posted 5/14/2014 2:08 AM (GMT 0)
Thanks again Lisa, and my Doc is a family Doc, but I looked up Psychiatrists JUST in case in my area, under my insurance.

I know I can't just go in and say: "Xanax works wonders for me, give me more"...

Not sure what to expect, I've never been to a Psychiatrist, but at least I feel better knowing I can go and see if they will prescribe me more IF I need it.

Whew I sure get tired of this anxiety stuff, I know the rest of you can relate!
Posted 5/14/2014 2:44 AM (GMT 0)
Oh yes I can relate. It's rude! lol.

I'd never been to a psychiatrist before til 2008. Prior to that, my family doc or her NP prescribed my Xanax or antidepressant. I was scared when my therapist suggested it bc I got confused thinking a psychiatrist was like the end all be all "shrunk" for the craziest ppl.. HA! But many ppl still think that. They're MD's who specialize in brain issues like a Urologists specializes in urology issues! :). My friend sees him for her fibromyalgia meds as it's thought Fibro is a brain issue. My one friends son sees him for his ADHD meds....

Also, check & see what therapy your insurance might cover. I just found out by accident that ours covers 7 free sessions!

Keep us updated!

Blessings,
Lisa
Posted 5/14/2014 1:29 PM (GMT 0)
Hi Lisa and thanks so much. I checked and my insurance does cover "mental health" services, so ... It makes me feel better that there are more options than 'just Doctors' if they don't like to prescribe benzos.

Funny, my friend who from what I can tell, does noit have anxiety, but his Doc gave him xanax to help him sleep and a bit of depression. And he gets to take it every day, and refills without hassle.

My insurance doesn't cover that Doc, or I'd go see him. ...

Ahh well, just glad to meet all of you. :)
Posted 5/14/2014 2:06 PM (GMT 0)
Feeling anxious over whether or not my Doc will renew my xanax today.

Oh the irony!!

(I had a 30 day prescription as directed on the bottle, but she wanted me to try skipping taking it some days, and I couldn't much, so I'm almost out already - Plus I'm trying to save a few for emergencies), annd with the newest health worry, I AM needing it every day until I get test results back...

This is for real health anxiety, not anxiety... (Call back on a mammogram test and more tests). Just the wrong thing to get my anxiety in high gear............

Ugh.

Thanks for letting me vent, no need to reply....
Posted 5/14/2014 2:34 PM (GMT 0)
...sending postive thoughts and prayers regarding both your appointment with your doctor to discuss your Rx...and of course your results.

Big breath, and remember that while it is natural to feel anticipation and anxiety while awaiting test results...you can use a mantra as a tool to shut down the worry spiral.

When my mind keeps returning to a worrisome thought that I have no control over at that moment, I repeat:

"It is not time to think about that right now."

I then do something to distact myself away from that cycle of fretting!

Let us know how it is going soon.:)

S.C.
Posted 5/14/2014 2:48 PM (GMT 0)
My Anxiety Life

Good Morning and welcome to HealingWell.  I am Kitt and I was dx in 1982 with anxiety and depression.

My primary care doctor covered my mental health medications for many years but one of our agreements was my willingness to see a therapist.  Eventually my PCP told me He was out of his realm in prescribing the mental health medications as so many new ones were available for my dx so he called the psychiatrist at our clinic and walked me over to her office - one of the best things my PCP ever did for me.

With so much expectations on us these days, it is no wonder people are on prescriptions. Much of the stress we feel is self induced as we set our expectations of ourselves extremely high. My dx comes with chemical imbalances;  chemical imbalances need help. Using antidepressants is not the best choice for everyone but for me it works.   Xanax is NOT for depression but anxiety, which is just as real as depression.

Combine the medications with therapy, self-help and peer support and you have a  a powerful treatment plan.

Each of us is unique so there is no one size medication treatment plan; it may take work at seeking out what works best for you.

I have been on a benzodiazepine the majority of the time since I was dx and never used more than prescribed but also see my Pdoc every 3 months or more often if I start to have issues. I believe that prescribing (or not prescribing) benzodiazepines should be based on assessments of benefits vs. risk.  I'm very aware that some people can have awful experiences with some medication.

As a patient, I'm grateful that benzodiazepines exist, and that psychiatrists are willing to prescribe them.

I know this is a controversial topic and my comments are strictly my own feelings re medications and anxiety.

Knowing you now have health insurance makes me feel good for you.............

You have the choice of finding a good therapist, psychiatrist and covered care for mental health disorders.

Stick with us as we know where you are coming from and what you are going through.

Gentle Hugs,

Kitt

 

Posted 5/14/2014 3:04 PM (GMT 0)
Thank you my friend Scaredy Cat... I appreciate your kindness and the time you take to give everyone here support... a gentle hug for you too... You are special...


Dear stkitt, you too, knowing your own condition and fears and current health challenges, you are an angel to continue to spend time giving support here, bless you my friend..... Your issues far more challenging than mine right now, I thank you kindly for extending yourself.... xo

Dealing with anxiety my whole life (and a challenging life it's been so far! Wow....) I have done everything I can to "heal myself". Started back in the day when talk radio had a couple wonderful psychologists on every week day. I listened religiously.

Given the course of my life, the benzos are... well, a miracle for me.... Yes I know everyone has a different experience and opinion about them, but I'll skip the details of my difficult life I have had so far and simply say, I've had my (un)fair share of heavy things to deal with so it's only natural (to me) that my panic attacks and anxiety are so high.

Not being a fan of pills or medicine, benzos for me are like oxygen, so I'm simply scared they will take it away from me as my life has simply been one of bad luck and depressing challenges since I was a kid.

NOW I have finally found something that normalizes ME, now I have to find a Doctor who understands my desperation to feel normal and give me a break over the struggle.

I think you both know, a lot of simply allowing people to vent is very cathartic. Thank you for letting me express myself.
Posted 5/14/2014 7:18 PM (GMT 0)
I had a psychiatrist appt today and was prescribed .25 Xanax 2/day. I still have some and she gave me a hand held paper refill. My pdoc is wonderful. I can see a pcp hesitating w/benzos so call your ins and get a list of psychiatrists they cover & make your appt! :-)

I love this forum and being able to help and get help. Love that we're all informed and not fear mongrels to eachother like other forums I've visited in the past that left me feeling worse!

I truly appreciate you all and praying for everyone to find or continue to find and be blessed with healing and peace in your souls!!!

Blessings,
Lisa
Posted 5/14/2014 8:35 PM (GMT 0)
I did that Lisa, got names of psychiatrists. .

Why am I so hesitant to call?

I guess I don't know what to tell them other than, the xanax works miracles for me, can you keep giving me more? (the gist of it anyways)

And I'm afraid he would think I am just trying to "get drugs"...

Does this make sense...?

Everyone I mention this to (friends, my anxiety, and one who is on xanax too) are telling me to BE CAREFUL, DO NOT let the Doc think you are addicted to the xanax... They will NOT give it to you if they think that's all you want and you are addicted.

Ummm... Then I read online that others have been on it daily for years, so I am scared and confused.

Is a psychiatrist better to go to? Will they understand my NEED for them?

I am anxious (story of my life lol)...


Yes, I too have been on many forums and chat boards over the years, this is a wonderful place.
:)
Posted 5/14/2014 10:46 PM (GMT 0)
Yes, a psychiatrist is the better way to go IMHO. 10 years ago, the family Dr was a fine option but with the new DEA laws, they're getting away from it.

What you can do is call a pdoc and make appt. They will ask you a standard list of questions they ask everyone plus your history etc. You can be very honest and say you don't want to be on an AD as you've found relief for the first time in 30 years w/Xanax prescribed by your PCP & you prefer that route. My Pdoc & the NP's there are wonderful and listen to you. Doctors "know" most "pill seekers" & with your honesty, they should know you are not one. (Sidebar- if you've ever struggled with a substance addiction, it could be an issue and they might try you on something like Buspar) but I didn't read where you said anything like that. If that's the case, just be honest & say you don't even like to take pills but for the first time in 30 yrs you've found relief with Xanax and have taken it as prescribed by your PCP. I'm speaking from experience with my PDOC & they are kind and listen and know Xanax does work, as they write scripts for it all the time.

What state are you in? If you were in northern indiana like me I'd give you my Pdocs # and go with you to be your support hehe :-). Otherwise, you'll be fine. Just make the appt soon bc many Pdocs are booked a month or so out. You'll be ok!

Blessings,
Lisa
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