Sparky,I am so sorry to read of your daily anxiety and depression that plagues you since your break up. While a grieving period is expected after a breakup, as breakups are a form of loss, it can be easy to get caught in an emotionally harmful pattern if we don’t actively push ourselves forward in our lives.
It is important to remember to take care of your daily needs when dealing with a breakup. Go to the gym, jog, swim, walk, cook, etc. Some may feel less motivated to grocery shop, prepare meals, eat, or shower after a breakup. These may require some extra effort at times, but push yourself to continue your daily routines as before.
I know you can become overwhelmed with all the advice and coping skills offered by those of us well meaning people who have been in your shoes but most important is to pick one coping skill that you feel you can commit to and do consistently on a daily/weekly basis.
I am going to suggest an easy one - Keep a journal for your eyes only. Here is a link to a free online journal.
http://www.anxietyreallysucks.com/how-keeping-a-journal-can-help-you-with-anxiety/
A journal is a safe place to retreat to where you can privately examine your thoughts and feelings without feeling overwhelmed or pressured. If your feeling sad write it down, have a good cry - if your angry, vent away after all nobody said life was fair so let loose in your journal.
There are no rules in this either. You could write daily or weekly. You can write for 3 days in a row and take 3 days off. You can write for an hour one time and a minute the next. Journaling doesn’t have to focus on any one thing. You can write about things unrelated to your loss. Scribble down a joke you heard that made you laugh or a new person you met who left an impression on you. Another good exercise is to journal what you are grateful for in life. This could be your family and friends, a job you enjoy, your own good health or your faith. There is something very spiritual in offering thanks while you are in the grasp of grief.
I bet by now you are thinking "my words aren't worth while" - be easy on yourself. Remember writing anything that is heartfelt is worthwhile and has meaning.
I journal and find it helpful, especially if I am feeling lonely, afraid or just anxious. I just start scribbling away and when I read back what I wrote I am amazed I had so many feelings bottled up inside me and nobody to share them with.
Try it, anything good is going to take some work. Remember you are a wonderful, worthwhile person and life will be better again.
Kindly,
Kitt