Thinking of death again

Hello everyone,
Needed to talk about this with someone other than family. When I had first gotten my panic attacks in 2005 I swore I was dying. Every symptom, pain, ache I had, I went to the ER always sure I was dying. I've done really good this time around and my anxiety has been minimal. I don't think I'm dying now with any new symptom. However I am focusing on death again... What if? I am now constantly thinking what if I die, what if my dog dies, what if a family member dies etc.. I had come to terms with death awhile ago telling myself it's part of life, but now anytime I think I start to cry and get sad.. I'm sure it's because I'm still missing my dog who got put down on the 12th of August. I just need some advice because I'm getting a little depressed again.

Oh sweetie, let me start by reassuring you that this is really, really normal! Especially if your little furball was family to you. (You know,...some people, their dogs are "just dogs" and to others, they're truly part of "the family!")

Our dogs have always, always been our babies. My heart goes out to you.

I'm not saying this to scare you, just to hopefully reassure you (preemptive disclaimer?) Our last dog, a 124lb Aussie/Lab/Huskie mix,...lived to be 24 (and unheard of age for a dog that big!) It took me years to recover. Yes, years.

Again, that's not to scare you. That's to remind you this grieving process is raw, fresh, and still very, very new and sore!!

I, for one, cannot just "bounce back" from losing an animal as if nothing happened and get on with life. Not with my horses, cats, dogs, or even my parrot. Nope. Doesn't work that way.

I go on incredible emotional roller coasters. And frankly, I don't care if you saw it coming or it was expected and it was time, etc., etc.....it does not help ease or erase or eradicate the process of this pain of loss.

Oh my dear, it's a huge trigger. Big time. Massive. At least I personally believe it is based on my own experiences.

And just like you, I find it can be all-encompassing until healing takes place.











M.

Paddi, I've also had losses, unexpeted ones aswell. After I lost my dad two years ago, my questioning and thoughts about death increased. I was always a spiritual type of person who had answers for all such questions but not anymore.
One actually need quite long time to forget aout all and continue. Hope you really feel good soon.

For me it's about "forgetting" the bad thoughts it gives, but remembering the experience and good memories with our beloved ones who passed away. And then accepting the death as it is. I guess it works different for everyone.