Feeling so alone

Hi, everybody:
Just wanted to vent for a bit, if that's ok.
This afternoon my 9 y/o daughter had a friend's birthday party and I went with her. Everything was going great but suddenly I realized I was out of breath and dizzy. I started to get very conscious of my breathing. I coped the best I could and managed to get home all right, but when I got here my husband had gone out and I began feeling very anxious again.
I'm still checking my breathing every couple of minutes.
I'm so tired of this, as soon as I have these episodes I also get very sad and start thinking about how lonely I feel. I have two beautiful amd amazing little girls, great friends and co-workers but the fact that my parents are gone makes me feel lonely. My marriage isn't going very well lately and I'm sure that doesn't help either.
I just want to feel like I'm capable of being by myself and of taking care of myself but I just cab't manage to do that. I always feel so helpless.

Thanks for reading this, I hope you are all having a nice night.

Hi Rose-

That "anxiety hangover" is the pits, I know. I get a low mood/hopeless feeling afterwards sometimes. I think that low feeling afterwards also dredges up sad things from our past- past hurts like losing/missing parents, regrets, etc. I know for me, I get depression if the anxiety goes on for too long untreated.

Are you in therapy by chance or taking any medications? It sounds like you could really benefit from seeing a therapist. Anxiety is a viscous cycle that makes us OCD about things like our breathing, pulse, etc. it's treatable but challenging to do on our own that's why most of us here are in therapy, take meds or do both.

We sure understand & will support you during your rough patch.

Thank you so much for your kind responses. I haven't been consistent with therapy and right now I'm taking 5mg of Lexapro. Was on 10 mg for 2 years, was well enough to start tapering with the help of my psych, but the w/d was so bad that I only made it to 5 mg and stayed there.
This morning I woke up very early for no reason and found the most beautiful sunrise and can't help feeling grateful for this beautiful life. Very often anxiety makes me not apreciate it, so today might be a good day.

I hope it's a good day for you, too.

Hi A.R.,

Great advice above...so I will just add my support. Know that we understand and are here anytime you need friends to listen. . . Anxiety can make us feel isolated...you have those who know what you are going through here!

S.C.