Posted 5/10/2015 6:06 AM (GMT 0)
Posting on this forum in hopes that someone can either relate or be able to tell me what is wrong with me. I have been feeling extremely afraid and paranoid of other people. The thing that really bothers me the most is I feel terrible regarding my boyfriend. I obsess over things. If I try to call him and cannot reach him, I freak out and panic. I also don't like when he watches movies without me. I have an extreme feeling that I am losing him when he watches movies/shows without me or if I am unable to reach him on phone, skype, etc. Regarding people at my school, I feel like most of them hate or dislike me. I feel so inferior to most everyone else. I hate that this stuff affects my everyday life and it really affects the quality of my life. I feel like I cannot think rationally or normally. I have seen some kind of being in my head and I try telling him that I will not live like this and that what I feel is not rational and that I need to think more normally, but I feel like I'm fighting this battle all inside my head and it's not getting better on its own. I very often cannot sleep well and I have a lot of physical pains - mostly abdominal pains and aches and I know it is tied to how I feel on the inside and my mental state, but I do not know how to change this or make it stop. How can I not feel so alien and so terrible, fearful, and panicked?