Very down!!

I'm so down. My husband want to go to italy to visit his parents and I'm terrified to go. I can't be on a plane for 8-9 hours and with 2 small kids. One is almost 8 and little one is 2.5. He wants to take my 8 year old and it kills me. I know my son will want and cry Dr me and my anxieties are stopping me. All we have been doing is arguing and arguing and he does it in front of my kids which ticks me off. Constant I'm tired of this he's a good man and I understand he wants to see his parents but I can't go. I don't want to ruin the trip for my family. He saw his parents last year they came here. I'm a mess. I don't want him to take my 8 year old I Will miss him much and I knOw he will cry for me. I wish I was a strong women who could do anything but unfortunately anxiety has take over my life. My husband has been very supportive but I think he's tired of my problem. I can see his fustration with me. I just want to hide in a hole.

I'm sorry you are going thru this, I know traveling is anxiety provoking. I have to ask though, and I understand you'll miss your son, but what is your main concern with him going with his dad to Italy? Is your husband responsible? I think you need to let him take your son, after all he is the father too. I know you will miss him, and he will miss you but I am sure he will have a blast and then he will come home to you and tell you all about it.

bambola,

I recently heard the saying, "Worrying won't keep the bad stuff from happening" which is essentially saying not to worry and just let whatever happen, happen. While this may be misconstrued, I feel people with issues such as yours (and mine) have stopped truly living. Tomorrow isn't guaranteed. We don't know our fate.

When they go, don't you have family or friends that you can rely on that can stay with you? I'm sure they would love your company.

I do not say this to scare you, but it is my duty to report it. During my morning commute, I sometimes catch the news on the radio. Within the past few weeks, it has come to my attention that airport security is not so great. I'm not sure if it was a certain airline or what, but they failed miserably in their security checks prior to a person boarding. Rest assured the leader of the operation with all the failures has been replaced and the employees are being retrained, so he may want to wait a bit until things are better under control.

Are you medicated for your anxiety? Do you go to counseling? Do you do any breathing exercises?

bambola,

Call me John if it's easier. I tend to pick the most obnoxious screen names. :)

I'm pretty sure the issue is in the states and don't recall Canada being a part of the equation.

I know what it is like to feel like a burden. I do not complain unless I am specifically asked how I'm doing, which is also a question I hate. However, if your family is truly family, you won't be a burden to them and they will WANT to help you.

When you have these attacks, what is it about them that embarrasses you? Walk me through one.

You're going to therapy. That's good. What medication(s) are you on? Why are breathing techniques difficult for you?

Let me say this in regard to your child going to Italy with your husband. I feel when the opportunity presents itself because Italy is so far away, you owe it to your son to let him go. I lost my grandfather when I was 9 and your child is 8. See where I'm going with this? However, I understand. I remember when my girlfriend at the time was on a flight and I had a tough time relaxing until I knew she was safe. To a degree, I had work to occupy my thoughts. 8-9 hours is a long flight, but there are plenty things you can do to get your mind off of it. Statistics state we are far more likely to have a car accident than crash in an airplane, so even if you could drive to Italy, flying is still safer.

bambola,

Gallbladder attacks are ROUGH. Has he considered having it removed? I had mine taken out in October. Many people will have it removed after just experiencing one of those. Oh, the pain.

Your son would stay with his grandparents, wouldn't he? Do your husband's parents speak English?

bambola,

I'm a little stumped as to where to lead you then. You might encourage your son to learn Italian. Kids that age are sponges and retain a lot. It may serve him well.

bambola,

Well, I didn't expect he would learn it that quickly, but in the meantime, he could be learning some basic vocabulary. It would also serve him well in future trips.

I apologize for not having been very helpful. I felt I have done nothing for you. Perhaps someone else will come along that can.

I am logging off for now.

Hi hibee

I italian. I. can speak Italian well not fluently but I can get by. I know right now I cannot go. I need to get my anxiety under control first. I worry for my son.