Posted 9/16/2015 2:27 AM (GMT 0)
Hey everyone,
I (really) apologise in advance if this is ends up being a bit of a long read - I fear I'm going mad and need to get it all off my chest :(
Long version - tl;dr at bottom
Bit of background: 23 year old male. Smoker. I've assumed that I've suffered from depression for around the past 3 years although I've never had a formal diagnosis. While I've had my bad moments, I've always managed to keep control on it. I've also suffered a bit from anxiety (general anxiety, never health related), however this has always been manageable, and has never shown physical symptoms.
about 4 months ago, I started experiencing a pain in my right shin & calf. This pain gradually got worse over a number of weeks, to the point where it felt like my leg was on fire when I was sat down for any length of time. Googling symptoms (I know, shouldn't have done it) and I ended up on the NHS "symptom checker", which promptly told me to dial 999 (my symptoms matched that of a blood clot). My anxiety suddenly went into overdrive and triggered a really bad asthma attack. Went to the doctors the next day for treatment for my asthma and to have my leg looked at. Was told that there was probably nothing wrong with my leg, and I was given a physiotherapist self-referral form. Because of my asthma, the doctor didn't seem that interested in my leg symptoms.
The time between seeing my doctor and the physio was around 2 weeks, and in that time my anxiety built and built, with all my concerns being health related. I had several panic attacks during that period, all absolutely terrifying experiences. After visiting the physio, they diagnosed me with piriformis syndrome (trapped nerve in hip muscle), and sent me on my way with some exercises. I thought this would get rid of my anxiety, and to some extent it did, however I still had that niggling feeling in my mind.
Fast forward to 2 1/2 weeks ago, and I noticed I had a small ache/pain in my chest. It wasn't that bad, but over a couple of days the pain gradually got worse, until I went back to the doctor. I was told (again) that it was probably nothing, at most it being muscular. I went home and the next day after work the pain kept coming. This time it was also in my back, beside my left shoulder blade. I then had the biggest panic attack I've had, and I genuinely thought I was having a heart attack. My housemate phoned NHS 111 and they insisted I came in to A&E. Ended up spending most of the night there, and had a chest x-ray, blood tests (one for blood clots, not sure on the other), ECG and blood pressure monitor. All came back perfectly fine, and I was sent on my way.
Went back to the doctors and again told it was muscular - the doctor even said she was 99% sure it was nothing serious at all. However since then, my physical symptoms seem to have spread and I ache/hurt all over the place. They're by far the worst they've been and it's sent my psychological symptoms into overdrive, where I'm constantly at my wit's end and thinking the absolute worst of my situation.
tl;dr - Physical symptoms are getting really bad (I ache in most places, I also seem to be more aware of pain in my body). Mind is doing 1000 miles an hour and I can't shift the feeling that it's not just anxiety I have, but also some undiagnosed horrible disease (cancer, ms, heart problems. I don't know anymore...).
Going back to the doctors asap, however any advice/stories of similar thing happening would be much appreciated to see if I can at least take the edge off my nerves.
If you've made it this far, I appreciate you taking the time to read my ramblings :)
Thanks - Ed