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Anxiety makes me desperate to escape my own mind...

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Posted 12/23/2015 3:53 PM (GMT 0)
Hi - I'm hoping someone might be able to put my mind at ease slightly.

I'm 24 years old and about 2 months ago I suffered with a panic attack while out with friends, it was terrifying and completely out of the blue as I had never had anything like it before.

Since then I have suffered with panic attacks regularly at work and when I'm out. As a result of this I began to suffer with some derealisation which led to depression. I'm sure much of this was caused by a hormone imbalance due to my Implanon contraceptive implant. I'm an outgoing person with very few things to worry about. having the Implant was the only thing that had changed around that time. I have since had this removed and many of my symptoms have subsided eg. I no longer have dizzy feelings or heart palpitations.

However - I can't shake this feeling in my own mind. I feel like I'm trapped in my own thoughts and I desperately want to escape myself. It's a really frightening feeling and the frustration that comes with not being able to shake it is unbearable at times. I feel like I'm going to lose control of myself. Sometimes it feels worse than others however it never completely goes away, it's always in the back of my mind. I feel like I'm going mad.

I've made an appointment to see a therapist, my first session is in two weeks so hopefully that will help. I'm reluctant to use medication after my experience with hormonal contraceptives.

has anyone felt something similar, will it ease up anytime soon?

thank you in advance.
Posted 12/23/2015 4:46 PM (GMT 0)
I have similar issues, except I still have some heart palpitations, lightheartedness, and brain fog. I know for sure I have a hormone imbalance, but I also have major unresolved childhood trauma that I'm starting to believe is the root cause of the anxiety. The one thing I do have going for me is my panic is very short. Less than a minute. I do have uneasy, anxious feelings a lot. This is more common that you think. I started talking to my friends and family about it and believe it or not, of the people I talked to, more of them had/have anxiety of some type than not. I think some people are better at blocking it out than others. It can also exhaust you, which seems to make it harder and harder to deal with.
Posted 12/23/2015 5:24 PM (GMT 0)
Hi L., and welcome!

I am sorry to hear of your anxiety challenges.:( I know how this feels...so be assured you are not alone.

Even after an initial attack happens, and/or a trigger is removed...some anxiety effects can remain and challenge us.

It is great that you have set up a therapy appointment. ..as I know this will be of benefit to you...well done on proactively seeking help!

For now I suggest that you check out our awesome Resources at the top of the main forum page here. It is filled with great material for self help coping skills that you can get started on right away. There are links for relaxation/stress relief...as well on specific help for derealization/personalization which you may find of use.

Keep posting with us for support as well. :) We do understand and care!

Talk soon,

Scaredy Cat
Posted 12/23/2015 11:49 PM (GMT 0)
I can certainly relate to your statement about being trapped in your own thoughts....I'm a victim of that myself and it drives me nuts. The more I think about my anxiety plaguing me, the worse it gets and I've read that's a very common symptom of anxiety...so I guess we just have to accept that. Trying to fight it off just makes it worse. But youre not going crazy..it just feels like that sometimes. I've gone thru this many times during my life but it does get better eventually...just keep seeing your therapist and taking the Xanax as prescrbed...you won't get addicted if you follow the dosage properly. Good luck!
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