Anxiety & PTSD

I lost my mom to leukemia when I was three years old. That led me to grow up being risk-averse and anxious about changes in my life. At age 72, I now have full blown anxiety attacks and have been diagnosed with PTSD. I worry about my 81-year old partner dying (he's got AFib and diabetes), about my dog dying, about my son and his family moving away from me. I'm anxious before I do anything because I'm afraid I'll do it wrong and people won't like me and will leave me. I have a poor self image because my "child-self" believes I was such a bad person, my mom chose to leave me.

I take meds for depression and anxiety attacks, but they don't seem to be working. I see a social worker weekly (and have for years) to talk out my daily anxieties. This past week, she told me "what others think of me is none of my business". I'm going to hang that over my computer.

I can't see myself living this way for another ten to twenty years. I've done everything I can think of to stop the anxiey/panic attacks, but they don't stop. Have I missed something?

aberlaine,

Believe it or not, but I totally share your anxiety issues....I lost my mom to breast cancer when I was 11. I am an only child, so had no one to truly understand my pain.

I have major ridiculous anxiety and panic attacks. Feel desperately alone now that my kids are all adults and one lives far away. I am miserable on many levels. I just want to feel a part of something and not so isolated. Trying to find groups to join, etc., but it's nothing long term and very casual.

Frustrating!

Best thoughts to you.

LHA112 said...
aberlaine,

Believe it or not, but I totally share your anxiety issues....I lost my mom to breast cancer when I was 11. I am an only child, so had no one to truly understand my pain.

I have major ridiculous anxiety and panic attacks. Feel desperately alone now that my kids are all adults and one lives far away. I am miserable on many levels. I just want to feel a part of something and not so isolated. Trying to find groups to join, etc., but it's nothing long term and very casual.

Frustrating!

Best thoughts to you.

I hope you don't mind me replying here, but I have some of the same issues as you do with panic and anxiety since my kids are grown also. I feel like I'm going through the empty nest syndrome. I've never had anxiety like this before. My Mom is still alive, but has been very sick my whole life with schitzophrenia.