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Am I losing my mind?

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Posted 12/11/2006 6:44 AM (GMT 0)
I've been going through one hard time after another ever since my divorce 1 1/2 yrs. ago.  Yesterday, I couldn't leave the house - too depressed.  Today I felt better so I went to the bank, withdrew $60 then went to a store only to discover that I left my ATM card in the machine.  Later, I attempted to do laundry.  Took only my keys and my wallet with me and then went to a drive through for something to eat.  about half hour later I went to get my wallet for the laundry and my wallet was missing!  I remember having my wallet in my pocket and as I walking to apartment in the car port area a neighborhood doggie charged up to me, whimpered and rolled onto his back.  I bent over to pet him.  I'm sure that is when my wallet dropped out.  I checked and triple checked the car and the walkways, bushes, etc.  I became very angry about my life, having to live in an apartment and feeling like some jerk came along and said "SCORE" picked up my wallet and went on their way.  I want to give humanity the benefit of the doubt - I pray that someone will turn my wallet in to the managers office but I know my chances are slim.  I am unemployed and now I have to spend the day at the bank, DMV and on the phone.  A lot of other little things that can't be replaced (even gift cards) and of course my wallet and the cash. The cash hurts the most.  It was for groceries.  I live alone and I struggle with situational anxiety/depression and I also suffer with frequent migraines.  Sorry for the long vent.  I could use some prayers.
Posted 12/11/2006 8:15 AM (GMT 0)
Hi hopeful..
Sheesh you are getting a rough deal!
Ok. lets try and think logically even though we are thinking aaaargh!
Main problem..lack of cash flow...how would you feel about taking in a boarder?
Can you work from home?
How about changing tack and trying something different in the job line..do you have another skill up your sleeve?
As always my thoughts and prayers are with you..wish I was there to help you through all this nonsense..

Maree
Posted 12/11/2006 11:28 AM (GMT 0)
No hun you are not losing your mind
You have so bleeding much on it you are easily forgetting things and I do pray for your sake that your wallet and all is returned
There still are a few good ppl out there
Praying and keeping you in my thoughts
Sometime this has GOT to get better for you
Luvs
Lyn
Posted 12/11/2006 9:37 PM (GMT 0)
hi lyn, wallet was not returned. Really hurts. I had to take care of all of it today and the job search is slow b/c of the time of year. Don't know what I'm going to do. Nobody to rescue me but God. I hope He reveals His plan soon. Don't know how much more I can take. My family is awful -- all of them are afraid of emotion. I can't even call them and leave a message - they call other people and jump on my Mom. Nobody is willing to help. I'm very much alone, family wise. I have been out on my own since I was barely 18 and now people are treating me I can't take care of myself. I moved home only once for 6 months but that goes out the window. I have to work really hard to remind myself that I am only human and I have more strength than weakness but I really got knocked down and I have to find a way to get up. God help me!
Posted 12/11/2006 9:41 PM (GMT 0)
Hi Maree, didn't notice your post at first. I live in a 1-bdrm. apartment. It wouldn't be safe to have a stranger stay in my living room. I'm working on the "other skills" part but today I had to run all over creation the bank, the DMV, the electric company, the post office. Have migraine now. I appreciate your prayers and thoughts. Means a lot to me. I feel very wounded inside but I've just got to pull through this. I pray that the phone will ring and "what a difference a day makes." I just want to work - even TEMP. I've never been through such a difficult and weird job search. I didn't expect this. Seems I have to learn everything the hard way.
Posted 12/11/2006 10:18 PM (GMT 0)
I sweetie, will definitely pray for you and pray that the migraine ends quick! 
Posted 12/11/2006 10:30 PM (GMT 0)

Hi-hopeful-

Although my situation is different, I can relate to what you are going through.  Seems when it rains, it pours-and things become harder to deal with when everything mounts up!  As you know from my posts, I, too, am job searching-only three weeks left at my current job. I thought it would be easier to find something- but it seems that the time of year is bad, and that there is a lot of competition out there. I find myself feeling like I am going to hyperventilate all the time. Not only is it tough to find something, but I worry about learning a new job, meeting new people, etc. But, I guess we have to remind ourselves that things will get better- and we will be able to look back at this time in our lives and say we got through it.

Hang in there and know that I am thinking of you!! Keep me posted...

Posted 12/12/2006 3:41 AM (GMT 0)
Thank you, a.l. thinking of you too and hoping things take a turn for the better! I just want to turn that corner, get a job and get my life and self-respect back.
Posted 12/12/2006 3:44 AM (GMT 0)
noely girl, thank you for your prayers (much needed and appreciated!)
Posted 12/12/2006 3:48 AM (GMT 0)
Hopeful - please do something about the posts from ALEXA newdotnet (here and on other forums). Thanks!
Posted 12/12/2006 4:32 AM (GMT 0)
GFK, I have alerted the administrator. Thank you.
Posted 12/12/2006 5:14 AM (GMT 0)
Awwwww ((((hopeful))))) my heart goes out to you.  This is really not fair, to lose that last bit of money when you really needed it.  That's terrible.  I hope that dog enjoyed his scratch.  It was an expensive one...oh ((hugs))) I wish I could do more other than pray.  I remember once losing all my money on a hot day and having to walk 6 kilometeres in the heat with no water.  I was so tempted to beg for money just for a drink, but it's too hard.  I also remember 6 months ago being so desperate I applied for a job shucking raw oysters (and got turned down).  Now I have a great job, God has a plan for you my strong friend.  Let's just hope he reveals it REAL soon.  Fingers all a'crossed for you xxxxxx
Posted 12/12/2006 7:01 PM (GMT 0)
(((((hopeful)))))
I hope things get better for you. That sounds awful and I'm sorry you have to go through it. My thoughts and prayers are with you.
Posted 12/12/2006 7:39 PM (GMT 0)
Thank you, Nervy and Chelle.  I appreciate your thoughts and prayers.  Last night I just couldn't stop crying.  Why is depression like that?  It just comes on even if you aren't thinking about your problems.  I was just watching a show and bam, an avalanche of tears.  The hardest part is that feeling inside my tummy.  I turn to God because I'm not an island.  I've gone through a lot of hardship in my life and I've even had financial woes but I have never been with zero income and no place to go.  If I don't get a job soon and a place, I don't know what's going to happen.  I'm just praying for that phone to ring and I'm job searching everyday like a maniac.  I can't wait to post something positive.

 

Posted 12/13/2006 7:04 AM (GMT 0)
Let's hope that's real soon hopeful....seriously soon.  Still praying for you ((((((huge hugs)))))

Posted 12/14/2006 2:43 AM (GMT 0)
nervymeg, I went to a TEMP job today and I made it through the day.  I woke up with migraine (moderate) and only 5 hrs. sleep and training was difficult under those circumstances but I did it and I feel so much better!  Thank you for your prayers.  I pray this is a long overdue turning point. 
Posted 12/14/2006 4:32 AM (GMT 0)

Hooray hopeful yeah yeah yeah It had to happen and it did.  I am so proud of you for making it through the day.  Temp work is terrifying.  I'll keep praying that this is just the beginning of a whole new wonderful period of life for you. yeah Yaay

(((((happy hugs))))

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