CRAWLING THE WALLS

  I just got though talking to my attorney for my hearing and I feel like I want to throw up I'm shaking so badly right now I feel like I'm about to have an p/a I took a valium but it hasn't kicked in yet, just the though of my hearing kicks in my anxiety into overdrive and rises my blood suger. I'm subpose to plow the driveway from the snow fall last night but I'm so week now that I don't think that I could even put the plow on the truck right now. Everytime I think about the hearing I just want it too go away and crawl under the bed I feel like I'm going to have a p/a at the hearing even before I get to talk and I still have that 450 mile drive ahead of me and I know it will be on my mind the whole time. I feel like I'm crawling the walls right now.

  Yea I know it's just the though of it that's killing me but it's so amazing how one's thoughs can put you in such a rut of doom that it's so hard to rashionals (sp) it as unreal fear.

  Great, more bad news the day I'm supost to leave I just found out that we got a big winter storm coming in with high winds though the pass which mean's I'll be driving in white out conditions, I'm going to see about flying in and hopefully they won't be grounded do to weather.