Losing hope

Hi people.

I've been on Mirtazapine (for the depression) for like 3+ years now, which seems to be helping. But nothing my Doctor gives me is helping with the Anxiety, which is causing the depression. I've been on 3 different types of beta blockers, and the ones im on now just put me to sleep than make the anxiety any more bareable, Hydroxyzine. My Doctor refuses to prescribe me any drugs like Xanax etc as he said they are too addictive. I've had counselling for the depression, and group therapy for the anxiety, and it's no better. My main problem is the sweating that the anxiety induces, I sweat all over til its literally dripping off me, so bad that at times i've had to change my clothes or dry them under a hand dryer at work. Nothing is helping, and now I've lost my job, the whole interview crap is like one major roadblock for me, no one will give me that chance.

I don't know how much more of this I can take. Over 3 years of daily anxiety attacks is really getting to me, I have no one to talk to about this (not that i'm a great talker at the best of times, anyone who has met me can vouch for that lol). So sorry for the rant, I know everyone here is in the same boat. I just cant see it getting any better.

Eliot.

great advice lyn!

Hey Eliot, it will get better. It might be hard to see right now, and i don't blame you for not seeing it. The tunnel can be so dark at times, there is no sign of light. But, it can get better.

I think you would benefit from speaking to another doctor. While benzodiazepines are addictive, so are all the other drugs (IMO). Some doctors believe in them and there benefits other don't, and like lyn said, people take them for a number of years and taper off when the time is ready. I've been taking Klonopin for a few years, and adivan when acute panic strikes, and i've been able to reduce the dosages with my doctor to a point where they help me and i dont feel sedated at all.

You're going through a really really rough and stressful time, so be easy on yourself. Try not to fight whats going on, and today, if possible do something that makes you happy. Try and remember what feels good or felt good in the past and try and do it. Something simple that wont cause more stress. EAt really good food, or go for a run or something. Just try and be good to yourself today and live in the moment. It's easy for me to say it, and i know how hard it is to apply, but if you can take you mind off all that is going on, even for five minutes you might see that light again.

What i've done in the past is something that draws my attention in. I like to take photos, so i started talking photos of birds. Not cause i like birds so much, but to get a good shot you really have to follow the bird and focus. Before i knew it, i was laying on the ground, climbing up trees to get a good shot. I kept doing this and along with therapy and some other relaxation technics I came to the end of the tunnel before i even realized it...

take it easy and slow. be good to yourself man, this is all really difficult stuff to go through. we are all here! so keep writing.

dan